Tell her to go Pref. she has nothing to lose and everything to gain. If she has a desire to join a sorority THESE are her options. She should proceed as if these are the only two sororities on campus, because for her, they are. To be honest, her grades are probably a huge factor. I hope she will give these two groups a chance. They see something great in her!

She knew it was going to be rough going in, then got sucked into the bubble. Be as firm as you can about moving forward. She WILL be happy in the long run. Rush is NOT real life and her perceptions are nowhere near the whole picture.

She loved Red Vines the first round and thought they were fun in a later round. How does that translate to "lukewarm"?

Pref is a game changer. Many women have fallen in love with chapters pref night. It won't hurt to go to the parties.

^^ This.

She can go to prefs and give it a shot. Previous posts are spot on!

As a sophomore grade risk, these two chapters gave her a chance and are interested in having her as a member. She needs to understand that those chapters she loved, don't see her as a member and needs to forget them for the next 24-48 hours because to her they do not exist. Concentrate on the chapters who wanted her. I know this may sound a bit harsh, but it is what it is.

Tell her to go to pref, and maximize her options on her bid card, if she does this she will get placed with a house... These houses have 120+ women, she will bond and find happiness with either one if she gives it a shot! This is a great place to be Greek and there are smart and beautiful women in EVERY house. And I agree she LOVED Red Vines early in the week! It is hard to determine if she clicked with these women after spending a total of 2 hours visiting the house.

WestCoastWonder - Sent you a pm. Your sister has been given some great advice from these women.

One other comment, and I don't want this taken the wrong way. I am sure your sister is a wonderful person but knowing a good amount about this university and about the grade requirements, she should be proud of the recruitment that she has had. She had low grades and if she continues and maximizes her options she will be a member of a sorority tomorrow morning! Please remind her of this.

Thanks for the update WW. To me, it sounds like your sister really likes Red Vines but let the tent talk make her second guess herself. It sounds like she really likes her Red Vines friend, so it stands to reason that she would like Red Vines if her friend does. It also sounds like she doesn't care much for Starburst. I hope she gives them both a fair shot. I am sure she's a great girl and would have a great experience in either chapter!

I think most sororities (except maybe the one everyone wants) have experience with distraught PNMs. It happens every year. Hopefully your sister was able to behave like a normal human being. If she could do that, it may not have been that bad at Red Vines. It's not always the kiss of death at preference. I hope everything works out for her. Recruitment has a way to make you lose perspective.

A very sweet recruitment story turned SOUR!
 

Thanks for the advice everyone, I'm afraid the Red Vines may drop her because she wasn't very enthusiastic at all, but i'm hoping for the best.


We'll see tomorrow morning which house is sweet enough to give her a bid! (no pun intended!)


Edit:

Final Update!!

My sister has dropped out of recruitment :/


I'm very disappointed she did and she and her Rho Gamma decided it would be best for her to just do informal. I'm upset because we spent so much time and money and it ended up like this. And you never know what houses are doing informal. I'm really sad, but she's stubborn and adamant about her decision and ultimately It is her choice. Thanks for all of the wisdom and advice.

Maybe next time. The school was Washington State, by the way.

WestCoastWonder - I'm so sorry to hear this, but of course, sisters do have wills of their own and you can't control all of their choices (it's good practice for having children - they're even worse about that sort of thing).

Since you mentioned the school, let me just say that as I told you in my pm, my daughter went to WSU her freshman year (2007) and went through recruitment there her sophomore year. Like your sister, she dropped out, and while her story ultimately ended happily and turned out for the best in her case, as I told you she nonetheless strongly felt that anyone who planned on staying at WSU and who wanted to go through recruitment there should see it through to the end. She sees things much differently now than she did when she went through and she knows she was extremely fortunate to have the opportunity to go through again at another school when she had a much better perspective on things.

Having said all of that, most of her HS friends went to WSU (we lived in Spokane for 11 years and she grew up there) and most were in Greek life, so she has kept track of things on that campus up until probably last year. In that time she knows that typically there were around three sororities that will do informal. One actually contacted her the February following recruitment. I know options for social activities outside of Greek life seem limited in Pullman, but there are some there. I would encourage her to sign up for COB and look into other things she can get involved in on campus if she hasn't done so already. Hope that helps.

Let her cry, help her figure out a plan B and assure her that life is long and while this may hurt a lot now - eventually it will be a minor sting.

I am so sorry for your sister! Wazzu is a great place and if she is truely interested in finding a home in the Greek system she should be able to do so! If she spends the semester working hard on her grades I bet she can become a great member through informal this spring! It is hard to swallow the disapointment right now, but please tell her not to give up!!

Thanks guys. I hope the houses she was interested in go through COB. But you never really know who will do informal. She's still really sad, but is holding up well and she'll be fine soon.