Re: Re: Well, what if...
 

I like the way y'all think! ;)

I would either give the ring to a neutral party or not give it back at all. Why would he want the ring back? (okay..dumb question...to get his money back)...But if it was to marry another woman...then nope...sorry can't have the ring back. I know if i was that other woman I wouldn't want a ring that has already been given to someone else! I want a BRAND NEW RING!

a NEUTRAL party?

NEUTRAL has nothing to do with this!

LMAO!

The reason I said neutral party is because this has happened to me before. I was engaged and found out the my fiance' was a lying, cheating, good-for-nothing...well I could go on describing him... :mad: But anyway, I didn't want to keep the ring (it wasn't all that to begin with) and I didn't want to talk with him...thus I gave it to a mutual friend. He had a ring as well that he gave her. She still has both rings, why i don't know :eek:

Life is so much sweeter since I got rid of him...but I can't stand the dating game :(.

Re: Re: The engagement is OFF...
 

That's exactly what I did... I did give back his class ring, because of its sentimental value to him...however, I put it in an envelope and dropped it in the mail (in hopes that it would get lost, stolen, damaged? I don't know..I was bitter back then.) But the engagement ring I pawned. I do agree with Ideal08, if it had been me breaking the engagement I would have given it back to him, but it was because of him that it didn't work out, so I kept it.

Well...
 

I would also probably give back the ring, depending on how expensive it was...I would never want to feel like I owe him ANYTHING...And I would not want to be embaressed by having to go to court...

I don't know...I guess I should try and follow the LAW, esp. since I am Pre-law, but...

The three scenarios Ideal, Aloving1, and KappaStar described sure sound GOOOOOOOOOD, esp. when I know I will be paying off a grip of student loans!!!

As kids, when somebody gave us something that we didn't want to give back we said 'black, black, no trade back.' That means that now whatever you just gave me is mine.

If you give me a ring, you better know that I'm gonna keep regardless of the circumstances. I have a thing for my jewelry and I know I wouldn't give it up for anything. You can take me to court and have Judge Judy and her smart a$$ order me to give it back if you want to, but I'm still not givin up the rock!! You'll have to pry it off of my cold, dead fingers.

Okay, I'm being overly dramatic. But, I still would not give back that ring. It was a gift to me.

I would give it back either way...
 

1) If I dumped him, then something wasn't right with him. So why have a constant reminder of someone you don't want to spend the rest of your life with.

2) If he dumped me, same scenario. I wouldn't want the ring because it just open a case of should'ves, would'ves, and could'ves.

I would give the ring and anything else back. My motto is "out of sight, out of mind."

GIVE IT UP!!!
 

The ring MUST be returned for the very reason many posters have said: "it was given in anticipation of marriage". Therefore you gotta GIVE IT UP!!!

AND...

YOU AINT EARNED IT UNTIL YOU SAY "I DO!"!!!!!:D

The trick to being able to keep the ring (why would you want it??) is that it had a dual purpose - an engagement ring given on a birthday can be treated as a gift - as can one given on Christmas. You also should NOT EVER let the man put an insurance policy on the ring - you do it yourself as owner. I've been told of, but never read, case law where the engagement was set, wedding plans were moving forward and the engagement ring was given later. When the engagement was cancelled, the woman was able to keep the ring because the ring itself was not the inducement for the marriage as it was already underway.

addendum
 

I believe the courts view it as the following:

an offer
an acceptance; which equals a meeting of the minds
the engagement ring becomes consideration for the promise to marry.

It is one of few unwritten promises/contracts that courts uphold.

Why I would want to keep the ring...
 

I don't see it as a reminder, I just see it as something I would want. The ring itself can be trashed, but I wouldn't mind putting the stone on a necklace. I guess it depends on how long I had it, and if I was attached to it. The fact that it had sentimental value is all the more reason I'd want to keep it. Failed relationships aren't ALL bad.

I wouldn't look at it as something he gave me, so I'd feel like I owed him something. I don't have that attitude. I feel like I'm entitled to whatever you give me, anyway, shoot, cuz I'm worth more than that rock. I'd look at it as mine, I EARNED IT, because I'm sure I put up with some type of BS somewhere along the way, no matter how small. So, OA, out the window with that mess, lol.

You know, I don't even know why men would try and rumble with us, anyway. We are the loophole findingest people on the planet, lol. Because, best BELIEVE there is a way around everything.

Good point, RowdyRed, good point! :)

I say return the ring but keep the rock and pawn it! :D

If the ring were a family heirloom (someone stated this earlier), I would return it.

If I called off the engagement, I would give it back.

If he called off the engagement, I would give it back.

If I found out he was cheating or something like that, I would call it off and keep it. I wouldn't pawn it, but I would keep the stone for a necklace.