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-   -   How bad is it to miss your first chapter meeting? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=118317)

Barbie's_Rush 02-13-2011 12:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissNoelle (Post 2029848)
I just received a bid from a sorority and I'm really excited to join. I went to a new member meeting today and tomorrow we have mandatory council meetings, study hour, and chapter meeting where we're going to do our pledge ceremony.

I already made plans for this Sunday and I don't want to get out of them. My pledge mom texted all of us asking if we were going to be able to go - so since she ASKED, I'm assuming I'm allowed to say no? What happens if I miss a meeting?
Seriously? You waited until you were an upper classman to pledge and the first thing you're doing is trying to get out of going to something so important? You need to reevaluate your priorities and determine if sorority life is really for you.

SydneyK 02-13-2011 12:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Barbie's_Rush (Post 2029917)
You waited until you were an upper classman to pledge and the first thing you're doing is trying to get out of going to something so important?
Whether she's an upperclassman or freshman is inconsequential, I think. Missing your own pledge ceremony is just as bad for a junior as it is for a freshman. But, based on the OP's first post on GC (here), she's a freshman. A 20 year old freshman, but still, a self-proclaimed frosh.

Maybe all the recent troll-traffic has made me skeptical, but I'm thinking the OP lives under a bridge.

Barbie's_Rush 02-13-2011 01:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SydneyK (Post 2029921)
Whether she's an upperclassman or freshman is inconsequential, I think. Missing your own pledge ceremony is just as bad for a junior as it is for a freshman. But, based on the OP's first post on GC (here), she's a freshman. A 20 year old freshman, but still, a self-proclaimed frosh.

Maybe all the recent troll-traffic has made me skeptical, but I'm thinking the OP lives under a bridge.
Freshman or not, I'd still expect a little more commitment from someone her age.

SydneyK 02-13-2011 01:08 PM
^^ True. I guess I wondered if you had reason (aside from her age) to think she was an upperclassman (via PM, perhaps).

OP, despite your trollhood, I'll share my opinion: Skip the pledge ceremony. Tell the chapter that you've got something better planned. Then, if the chapter offers you another opportunity to go through the pledge ceremony, tell them that you already made plans that you don't want to cancel. They'll get the picture and you'll be spared the inconvenience of sorority demands.

AlphaFrog 02-13-2011 01:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SydneyK (Post 2029921)
A 20 year old freshman, but still, a self-proclaimed frosh.
Why do I get the feeling that she's a 20 year old freshman because she didn't get around to college until now. She probably had plans she didn't want to cancel on registration day the last couple years.

KSUViolet06 02-13-2011 03:00 PM
This is one of those situations where she probably asked to say "Who has an absolutely SET IN STONE, SUPER IMPORTANT THING, that they cannot miss and won't be able to make it?"

Ex: work that you can't get out of, jury duty, class, etc.

Not "oh hey I was supposed to do _____ and I don't feel like changing my plans!"

We rescheduled another ceremony for those NMs who had important things to do, but otherwise, you were expected to be there. It was generally more convenient for the chapter if everyone made every effort to come on that date. Plus, you go to experience it with the entire chapter there. If the chapter had to reschedule, generally, fewer members could make it (due to short notice.)

Alumiyum 02-13-2011 03:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 2029947)
This is one of those situations where she probably asked to say "Who has an absolutely SET IN STONE, SUPER IMPORTANT THING, that they cannot miss and won't be able to make it?"

Ex: work that you can't get out of, jury duty, class, etc.

Not "oh hey I was supposed to do _____ and I don't feel like changing my plans!"

We rescheduled another ceremony for those NMs who had important things to do, but otherwise, you were expected to be there. It was generally more convenient for the chapter if everyone made every effort to come on that date. Plus, you go to experience it with the entire chapter there. If the chapter had to reschedule, generally, fewer members could make it (due to short notice.)
Us too...though we didn't reschedule for "I have plans I don't want to break". We rescheduled for family emergencies, student athletes who had competitions, or students who were in plays on campus. Real excuses.

MissNoelle 02-13-2011 05:11 PM
UGH. I'm a sophomore! I don't know why I put freshman. I went to a private out of state university my first year, so a lot of the credits didn't transfer back to my state uni when I came back. So credits-wise I have to catch up and I'm freshman status, but I'm a second year college student. I've been overloading on credits though so that by next year I have enough to be a junior. But anywaaaaays.

I know it sounds flaky and like I don't want to commit. That's not true. I really do want to get involved on campus and be in greek life. I just REALLY don't want to go today. I can't even explain how much I don't want to. Maybe I'm not as into all this sorority stuff as I thought, or maybe it just takes a while to get into it. I think I'm just going to make myself go...I might as well. I don't want to regret it later. :/

KSUViolet06 02-13-2011 05:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissNoelle (Post 2029979)
I know it sounds flaky and like I don't want to commit. That's not true. I really do want to get involved on campus and be in greek life. I just REALLY don't want to go today. I can't even explain how much I don't want to. Maybe I'm not as into all this sorority stuff as I thought, or maybe it just takes a while to get into it. I think I'm just going to make myself go...I might as well. I don't want to regret it later. :/
I don't understand.

This is going to sound harsh, but hopefully you are mature enough to appreciate it:

If you are considering not attending your pledging ceremony and first meeting becasue you DO NOT WANT TO (not because you have an important event that can't be changed), you probably need to re-think joining.

This is not going to be the last time you're going to be asked to attend things when you maybe had other plans, something else you want to do, or just plain don't feel like it.

Recruitment, pledging ceremonies, Initiation, etc. As a sorority member, you're going to be expected to attend. There's no such thing as "I just don't want to." It is also expected that you have a valid excuse for not attending things.

Seriously consider your ability to commit to attending sorority events. If you find that you won't be willing to do so, you may need to decline now and avoid wasting this chapter's time.

princessamy 02-13-2011 05:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissNoelle (Post 2029979)
UGH. I'm a sophomore! I don't know why I put freshman. I went to a private out of state university my first year, so a lot of the credits didn't transfer back to my state uni when I came back. So credits-wise I have to catch up and I'm freshman status, but I'm a second year college student. I've been overloading on credits though so that by next year I have enough to be a junior. But anywaaaaays.

I know it sounds flaky and like I don't want to commit. That's not true. I really do want to get involved on campus and be in greek life. I just REALLY don't want to go today. I can't even explain how much I don't want to. Maybe I'm not as into all this sorority stuff as I thought, or maybe it just takes a while to get into it. I think I'm just going to make myself go...I might as well. I don't want to regret it later. :/
the sad part is some girl probably got cut during recruitment who would die to be in your spot.

AOEforme 02-13-2011 05:26 PM
I agree that you need to reconsider sorority life. I have not met a single person who "didn't want to" go to their pledging ceremony.

I've met girls who were perhaps annoyed with dress requirements, but never someone who just didn't want to go. It's the beginning of everything for you and marks a really special period in your life.

Not wanting to go is a big ole' red flag saying this is not for you.

SydneyK 02-13-2011 05:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissNoelle (Post 2029979)
I just REALLY don't want to go today. I can't even explain how much I don't want to.
Try to explain. I'm curious. Clearly, tonight's super-cool plans don't have anything to do with why you don't want to go to your pledging ceremony. So, what is it?

AZTheta 02-13-2011 05:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissNoelle (Post 2029979)
UGH. I'm a sophomore! I don't know why I put freshman. I went to a private out of state university my first year, so a lot of the credits didn't transfer back to my state uni when I came back. So credits-wise I have to catch up and I'm freshman status, but I'm a second year college student. I've been overloading on credits though so that by next year I have enough to be a junior. But anywaaaaays.

I know it sounds flaky and like I don't want to commit. That's not true. I really do want to get involved on campus and be in greek life. I just REALLY don't want to go today. I can't even explain how much I don't want to. Maybe I'm not as into all this sorority stuff as I thought, or maybe it just takes a while to get into it. I think I'm just going to make myself go...I might as well. I don't want to regret it later. :/
QFP...

I'm with PrincessAmy & KSUViolet06.

ETA: and AOEForme as well.

Barbie's_Rush 02-13-2011 06:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissNoelle (Post 2029979)
UGH. I'm a sophomore! I don't know why I put freshman. I went to a private out of state university my first year, so a lot of the credits didn't transfer back to my state uni when I came back. So credits-wise I have to catch up and I'm freshman status, but I'm a second year college student. I've been overloading on credits though so that by next year I have enough to be a junior. But anywaaaaays.

I know it sounds flaky and like I don't want to commit. That's not true. I really do want to get involved on campus and be in greek life. I just REALLY don't want to go today. I can't even explain how much I don't want to. Maybe I'm not as into all this sorority stuff as I thought, or maybe it just takes a while to get into it. I think I'm just going to make myself go...I might as well. I don't want to regret it later. :/
Seriously, if you're having to force yourself to go at this early point you just need to quit now.

Also, what's happening with your bio sister you rushed with?

IrishLake 02-13-2011 06:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Barbie's_Rush (Post 2030003)
Seriously, if you're having to force yourself to go at this early point you just need to quit now.
Yes, this. Please just quit.


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