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-   -   I've searched and searched, still looking for some help... (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=116945)

TPA85 11-15-2010 09:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2003734)
By the time you get to grad school, you are not going to give a sh*t about your fraternity.

w o w .........

Gusteau 11-15-2010 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2003734)
By the time you get to grad school, you are not going to give a sh*t about your fraternity.

I'm hoping you're trying to say that he won't want to be an undergraduate member at that point...otherwise I can't figure out your deal.

It always boggles my mind that people ask so much about being an active member while in grad school I'm on the verge of graduation/grad school and I am SO ready to begin involvement as an alumnus and not as an undergraduate (and my fraternity is one that allows graduate students to be active members).

DrPhil 11-15-2010 10:26 PM

DeltaBetaBaby's point was poorly expressed and I'm glad that people across councils and conferences disagree with that part of the post. :)

If DeltaBetaBaby indeed meant that he won't want to attend mixers with 22 year olds (which isn't a given because across councils and conferences there are alum who attend certain events with younger members) but would instead want an alum capacity, that may be the case. But, it is completely up to the fraternity, the chapter, and the individuals to figure that much out. The opinion of randoms on Greekchat and elsewhere doesn't matter.

DeltaBetaBaby 11-16-2010 11:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2003844)
DeltaBetaBaby's point was poorly expressed and I'm glad that people across councils and conferences disagree with that part of the post. :)

If DeltaBetaBaby indeed meant that he won't want to attend mixers with 22 year olds (which isn't a given because across councils and conferences there are alum who attend certain events with younger members) but would instead want an alum capacity, that may be the case. But, it is completely up to the fraternity, the chapter, and the individuals to figure that much out. The opinion of randoms on Greekchat and elsewhere doesn't matter.

Well, people did a really nice job of quoting only the first part of what I posted, and we are talking about IFC, here. If you are an alum, and you are going to the sorority mixers, you are officially "that guy", at least as the women view it.

Besides, he is asking this question w/r/t choosing a chapter. Does anyone really think that the chapter at the school where he might do grad school four years down the line should influence his decision of where to pledge his freshman year?

MysticCat 11-16-2010 12:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2003921)
Well, people did a really nice job of quoting only the first part of what I posted, and we are talking about IFC, here. If you are an alum, and you are going to the sorority mixers, you are officially "that guy", at least as the women view it.

Besides, he is asking this question w/r/t choosing a chapter. Does anyone really think that the chapter at the school where he might do grad school four years down the line should influence his decision of where to pledge his freshman year?

We just responded to what you actually said. "You don't want to be 'that guy'" or "you don't choose a fraternity based on what the chapter at your hypothetical future grad school might be like" is a far, far cry from "By the time you get to grad school, you are not going to give a sh*t about your fraternity."

DrPhil 11-16-2010 12:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2003921)
Well, people did a really nice job of quoting only the first part of what I posted, and we are talking about IFC, here. If you are an alum, and you are going to the sorority mixers, you are officially "that guy", at least as the women view it.

The first part of the post was extreme and based on how only some IFCers feel. Not wanting to go to sorority mixers like the undergraduates do is not prefaced with not giving a shit about your fraternity once you graduate/are in graduate school.

33girl 11-16-2010 12:23 PM

Not only that...at a lot of schools, the upperclassmen actually stay active and go to mixers...so a grad student there would only be a year or two older. Mixers are for socializing and seeing people, not just for hooking up.

DrPhil 11-16-2010 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2003940)
Not only that...at a lot of schools, the upperclassmen actually stay active and go to mixers...so a grad student there would only be a year or two older. Mixers are for socializing and seeing people, not just for hooking up.

I agree. I was going to say that but didn't know if that would be interpreted as "NPHC stuff." :p We discussed that in another thread.

AlphaFrog 11-16-2010 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2003940)
Not only that...at a lot of schools, the upperclassmen actually stay active and go to mixers...so a grad student there would only be a year or two older. Mixers are for socializing and seeing people, not just for hooking up.

http://9001chan.org/b/616/bfo-rlmente.jpg

Ok, I just wanted to use that pic. I admit it.

lucgreek 11-16-2010 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2003940)
Not only that...at a lot of schools, the upperclassmen actually stay active and go to mixers...so a grad student there would only be a year or two older.

Really? I'm a little shocked by this. By senior year attendance for seniors at mixers was hit or miss (both on the fraternity and sorority). It was mostly the the freshmen/sophomores who went.

33girl 11-16-2010 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lucgreek (Post 2003958)
Really? I'm a little shocked by this. By senior year attendance for seniors at mixers was hit or miss (both on the fraternity and sorority). It was mostly the the freshmen/sophomores who went.

That's lame. Period. No wonder we have an issue with lifetime membership, if people aren't even doing the most fun parts of being in a GLO while they're still in school.

DeltaBetaBaby 11-16-2010 03:10 PM

Also, I'm curious if most orgs even allow alums at events like mixers. It is a no-no for Phi Mu to have alums and collegians at an event with alcohol, so I have to think others have similar restrictions.

ASTalumna06 11-16-2010 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2003959)
That's lame. Period. No wonder we have an issue with lifetime membership, if people aren't even doing the most fun parts of being in a GLO while they're still in school.

I know, right?

I think it really depends on the school... and maybe the size of the chapters?

I know that at my school, there were a lot of alumni who came to hang out at the fraternity houses for mixers... and sometimes general parties. And it wasn't always the younger alumni, either. It was never weird or awkward, and I never felt like they shouldn't be there. I actually loved talking to the older alumni when they came around, and the brothers always welcomed them, so who was I to say anything, anyway?

It's not like they were there every week, but if they're in town, I say why not stop by? And if they're recent alumni, that doesn't seem "weird" or "creepy" to me that they'd be there to hang out and have a good time.

But maybe that's just me...

Drolefille 11-16-2010 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2003959)
That's lame. Period. No wonder we have an issue with lifetime membership, if people aren't even doing the most fun parts of being in a GLO while they're still in school.

Mixers are not necessarily the most fun part of being in a GLO in the first place...

33girl 11-16-2010 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille (Post 2004023)
Mixers are not necessarily the most fun part of being in a GLO in the first place...

I know, they have to go a loooong way to be as fun as membership selection meetings and rush practice, right?

And I said "most fun partS." There are of course, other fun things too - but as I said, a mixer isn't just a time to hook up. It's also to have fun hanging out with your sisters and other Greeks. It's just sort of sad that people get into a fraternity or a sorority partly for the purpose of widening their social horizons, and then refuse to partake of the social events.


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