I've wondered about this, too... the only moms we saw at bid day for my chapter were moms who were DGs, too.

I would hope that most moms would behave in a ladylike manner.

(This is the cue for someone who has a crazy story about a mom acting in a totally outlandish way at some bid day somewhere.)

i think that most moms would be more concerned about making their daughters feel better if things didn't work out as daughter had hoped, so they would not make comments about "damn xyz...i will never donate another dollar to them as long as i live" to her. but then, maybe that is the key-"working out as daughter had hoped", not mom.

I guess that on Bid Day, most moms who are there hoping that their daughter will pledge their legacy group already know yea or nay because most NPC groups require that legacies be put on the first bid list and it's rare down here for a daughter to go to her legacy pref, choose the other group, and not tell Mom. This is where I've seen the most upset people: daughter has 1 "flashy" group and 1 or 2 "non-flashies" (I don't know what else to call them) and she gets one of the non-flashies. (Or at least a non-flashy group in her opinion.)

And then she looks over and sees a crowd celebrating round the sorority she wanted....

I know there have been stories on here that yes, that does happen, up to and including the moms berating their daughters for "not trying hard enough" in front of everyone.

Oh. My. God.

It's called class, ladies.

heat index in the triple digits today, according to my daughter. auburn pnms, drink lots of water!!

I'll be taking my daughter to Auburn on Friday for move-in day and recruitment. Thanks to the many helpful posts on GreekChat, we have her prepared as well as we can.

I hope to start and keep up a thread over in the recruitment stories section (depends on how much cooperation I get from her :))

^YAY!! Can't wait to hear from you.^

good luck to your daughter Dad-and nerves of steel to you and her mother!

Hi Ladies!

KSUViolet06...your random question regarding how parents deal with "Susie PNM" not pledging a certain sorority while being cut or of her own choice made another situation come to mind. By the way, I've never seen a new pledges mother behave in a upset manner & I have seen a handful that pledged where they were not in their legacy house on Bid Day & the moms were genuinely thrilled their daughters were happy :-)

I realize this is an Auburn thread so I want to be clear this sad situation I'll be describing did not occur in Auburn's greek system...it occured in my beloved Tuscaloosa. Imagine your oldest & middle daughters go through rush & both pledge the same sorority. Your daughters are a few years apart & enjoying their college experience, as well as making friends within that sorority that they will cherish for a lifetime. Now, your "baby", the third daughter, comes to Alabama will every expectation she'll be joining her sisters and she's been looking forward to it for years, hearing all the wonderful stories her sisters have shared with her.

This 3rd child of yours goes through Ice Water Teas & is suddenly, out of nowhere dropped. When you inquire with alumnae from your hometown what the problem may have been they seem as dumbfounded as you. Afterall, these were the same ladies who helped support your other daughters in their pursuit of pledging. It comes to light pretty soon that a very POWERFUL local alum who is way over-involved decided that your daughter was "too heavy" to even be considered & dropped her early on as soon as possible so she could find "a better fit" in the greek community. WHAT???

Yes, this happened & has occured more than once. I know it seems odd to read on a forum like this because I wouldn't believe it had I not seen it with my own eyes. I am a dear friend of one of the sisters & had graduated when this occured, but everyone seemed floored that this occured, especially since the girls from the house all loved the sister, the girls from the PNM's hometown were crazy about her, & she had incredible alum support from her hometown.

The PNM continued with rush, discouraged & shocked, but found her new home in a wonderful sorority. Our loss was definitely their gain! The local alum who needs to get a life is still around after decades & she typically sticks to supporting (or not supporting) her hometown girls. But, I don't doubt for a minute her nose is in everyone's business & if there's something or should I say someone she doesn't deem worthy, she will move heaven & earth to get her way.

I say all this because I thought of my friends parents while reading the question on moms & how they handle their emotions. Imagine the class it took to be her parents, show up on Bid Day to your youngest daughter's new sorority house, all the while your middle daughter is all upset & angry at her house which is in close proximity to her baby sisters house. Now, I wasn't there, but I know this alum & she never misses a Bid Day. She stands outside all day hugging the "new babies" she's approved of. I am more than sure my friend parents saw her numerous times that day although I never asked because I tried to listen & not ask questions. The situation was stressful & I didn't want to upset my friend. I am sure they held their heads high even though I know for a fact my friends dad wanted to get her alone & just deck her!!

Sorry it I sounds like I'm ranting... it all turned out fine. I just thought people should be aware of the power some local alums have & choose to take in order to get their way...sure am glad "Miss Perfect" approved of me when I went through rush :-)

Tips for staying dry and cool (as best you can) during Recruitment:

Don't forget your rain gear...

-An umbrella, for obvious reasons
-A change of shoes in case yours get wet. There's nothing worse than having to squish around in wet shoes!
-A dry towel. You'll want to be able to wipe off the water if you are caught in a downpour.
-A plastic tote to keep all your belongings dry. Again, nothing worse than wet stuff! You don't have to keep your stuff in the bag, just keep the bag with you and put your things in it at the first sign of wet weather.

Keeping cool in the scorching Alabama sun in August

-Hydrate! Hydrate! Hydrate! What's the worst thing that could happen to a PNM during recruitment? Fainting during a party. So drink PLENTY of clear liquids (water is best!) so you don't end up this year's "fainter."
-(If you have access to a freezer) Freeze a bottle or two overnight and carry them with you for the day. As they melt, you'll have cold drinking water FAR longer than if you just took a few bottles from the fridge. To keep them from sweating all over you and your bag, wrap them in a hand towel. The towel will absorb most of the condensation, and as an added bonus, you can use the cool moist towel as a cold compress.
-An umbrella. You may look goofy, but I swear you'll feel 10 degrees cooler!
-A small battery-operated fan.
-Avoid direct sun exposure as much as possible.

Other tips.

-Don't leave the windows of your car down, or even cracked. Not only are you inviting someone to steal your vehicle or the things inside it, but Auburn is NOTORIOUS for sudden downpours that will drench the insides of your car. You'll be enjoying the wonderful fragrance of mildew and sour carpet for weeks to come.
-Everything mentioned here can be carried over to your first few weeks at Auburn as well. Even though it is called Fall Semester, Fall won't arrive for about 2 more months!

These helpful tips come from my own personal experiences with the unpredictability of weather in the South. Mostly, from being caught in the rain or heat and wishing I was better prepared.

Best wishes for a successful recruitment and school year. War Damn Eagle!

:eek::eek::eek:

I think if that had happened to me/my daughter, my next move (after going to the rifle range and putting powerful local alum's pic on the target and shooting the @#$% out of it) would be to contact national HQ and ask their help in drafting a policy that prevents this ridiculousness, for ALL chapters, with severe consequences if the alums just. don't. get. it.

This. I know SEC is a world I will never really understand but I just don't get how an alum can have so much power in membership selection.

:( I could just cry for in-house legacies who don't get a bid (as long as they haven't done something heinous). It's so wrong! I hear about more and more cases and all the house says is, "We liked other people better." Maybe so but now they've probably lost the in-house sister and sometimes her friends. What did they expect?

One of my daughters rushed as an in-house legacy, knowing full well what could happen. The chapter had released IHLs before and in fact released 2 that year. Both girls were ecstatic when she got her bid.

PNMs, please remember that nothing is for sure until you have that bid in hand!!

AMEN!

And sometimes, to make matters worse, the other chapters will drop you after open house if you have an in house sister because they figure they're wasting an invitation on you because you'll be joining your sister. So then you're left sitting around with big holes in your schedule with no options at all.