You know, I think you're right about cutting it off gradually -- if you get it cut to about shoulder length, that shouldn't be too much of a shock, and if you like it, you'll probably be excited to cut it even shorter the next time. :)

Here's why I think no layers can be good -- layered hair, IMHO, tends to look best when it has some body. When I got layers in my hair last time, it looked so awesome when the stylist did it, but when I did it myself, it would look great at first, but by the time I got to work, it was flat and looked stupid. (Isn't that always the case though? I wish I could have my stylist come over every morning! Or, I wish I had long, thick, curly hair!) With it all one length, if your hair is flat and doesn't have tons of body, it still looks sleek and good, and you don't have to fight with it. At least that's my thought. No matter what I ever try with my hair, I always end up going back to all one length, above the shoulders, and that always looks the best. Since it sounds like your hair is about as cooperative as mine, that might work for you, too.

I think shorter hair probably would make you look older, too. Of course, you can always ask your stylist, because they tend to know best.
:)

Don't you just hate it when you walk out of the stylist and it looks fantastic yet when you do it yourself...disaster. It takes me almost 2 weeks to get my own thing going. I agree with the shoulder length if long just doesn't work. You still have the illusion of length, but the weight of the hair won't flatten it (as much). One thing that DOES add body is color. Have you considered having your hair painted?

oh dear...
:D

pardon me while I smirk...have I CONSIDERED dyeing my hair? LOL...I have been dying my hair for FOREVER. :)

My hair was strawberry blonde when I was little, then it turned red, then it eventually became medium brown color. Well I don't think my now naturally brown hair looks very good with my enormous amount of freckles and fair skin. I really think red looks better, and it brings out the green of my eyes.

Let's just say I have experimented quite a bit of color. Once I even BLEACHED my hair :eek:! It looked HORRID and YELLOW-ORANGE!!! I will NEVER do that again LOL. I have mostly always dyed it some shade of red, however. Right now it is medium red with golden highlights. I really like the color, but it still doesn't add much depth to my horribly thin hair. It's funny though---I have a LOT of hair, but the individual follicals are still very fine, so it's just long, and straight as a toothpick and BLAH. If only this were the 60s---I'd fit in perfectly! :D

My hair has been EVERY COLOR on the chart!
When I lived in the soro house, I decided to streak my hair. I pulled chunks through the cap and brushed the peroxide on the strands. I set the timer and sat down to watch a movie. After a while I thought -gee, I've been sitting for a long time-went to the kitchen and saw it had been almost an HOUR when it should have been like 20 min. Our house mom turned off the timer because she thought someone had just forgotten about it. MY HAIR!!! It looked like one of those marbled cakes and the texture and the hair itself was FRIED!!! The next day I went to a really good ($$$) salon and they tried to salvage it. He kept picking at the strands and said "Vat did you do to ziz har?" I told him a soro sister did it! LOL

My hair is thick but stick-straight. When I was in college, it was long, about 3/4 of the way down my back. I would wash it before I went to sleep, put gel in it, let it airdry for a half hour or so and then put it in two french braids.. When I woke up, I took out the braids, flipped my head over and my hair had a little bit of wave and lots of body. Don't braid too tightly though, or you'll look like a crimped 70's refugee.

JustaMom - Do you remember when Sun-In first came out? I remember trying it in 7th grade behind my mom's back thinking I'd end up looking like a California blonde. It just made my dark hair look like it was rusted! But I wasn't the only Sun-In victim in my school so I didn't feel too bad!

I can remember when Summer Blonde came out during the height of the California/surfer craze. Many, many people who wanted to have surfer-blonde hair had pumpkin-orange hair and their parents made them leave it that way to teach them a lesson. One's a judge in Houston now, ROTFL!;)

I HATE myself! *GRR* :mad:

Sweetie, why???!

grr because I'm ugly! We have a crush party in a couple of weeks, and I don't know who to invite. The only guys I know are either taken, or if they're cute, they're complete jerks, cuz they'd think I'm ugly anyway. I know everyone says that it's all about confidence, but I don't have confidence, and how can I be confident when I honestly don't like myself?!?!

The key to being cute is THINKING you're cute. Stand up straight, smile, and just know that you kick ass :)

Have you tried a metal-barrel round brush? I use one to blowdry my hair and it makes it curl under really nicely, and makes it really full. It basically works like a big curler, but quicker.

Maybe you could try showering before bed? If you style your hair well enough at night, it shouldn't look too bad when you brush it in the morning

I can't think I'm cute...I just can't. I feel awkward when I stand up straight, and I feel fake when I smile all the time. As far as the hairbrush goes---yes I've tried that...I have at least 10 different hair brushes of all shapes and sizes. Also, take showers at night sometimes, morning other times, and afternoon sometimes. It just depends on what I have to do that day.

Oh Bunny, I'm sorry you're feeling bad! You know, those guys aren't jerks to you because they think you're ugly; they're jerks just because they're jerks. Forget about them! There are cute, nicer guys out there (believe me, they do exist but it takes some work to find them).

I can't imagine why you wouldn't like yourself! I can tell just from your postings here that you are fun, enthusiastic and an all around great person. As far as feeling ugly goes, we ALL have those times where we feel ugly -- everyone does. The trick is just to do the best you can to present yourself well. And even if you don't believe you're cute, if you ACT like you do, it works wonders.

If you're too stressed out about the crush party, just invite a friend or someone with whom you'd like to be friends, so there's less pressure.

Are you going to get your hair cut soon? Going to the salon always makes me feel better.

Yeah I'll get my hair cut when I have time (probably not until Thanksgiving break). I know I'm outgoing on here, but in person I'm shy until you get to know me really well. It seems to me like people never want to listen to what I have to say in person. I used to be a loud-mouth little girl, but I got in trouble in Elementary school way too often, so I stopped talking so much. If only I could be myself around people. The only person who knows the real me is my mother. We act stupid and crazy together, she's my best friend, but I'm afraid if I acted goofy around anyone else they'd think I'm weird (but I AM weird---I'm an AQUARIUS! LOL).

Girl, you sound a lot like me. I'm am very shy in person. It got me stereotyped as a snotty b*tch in high school and with some people in college. I am still a shy person around new people, but I've gotten a little better each year in college. I also had the most outgoing boyfriend (now husband) all through college. He was always the conversation starter and then I could just jump in when I felt comfortable. As a result, the majority of my friends are his guy friends from college. They had to take me in or else learn how to ignore me very well :D . I didn't join my sorority until my b/f graduated and I didn't fit in there immediately like I thought I would. I was hoping for instant friends since my safety net was gone. It turned out, I made my best friends in my sorority once I started opening up and acting silly like I do once I'm comfortable. I guess my point is that I have learned that holding back got me nowhere and that once I realized that and started acting the way I did at home, I made more friends. I think this is just something that you will have to learn in time. Many people tried to tell me what I'm trying to tell you, but I wouldn't listen. I hope things get better for you and that you can come out of your shell quicker than I did. I know it's tough, but I also know that once you do it, people will love your true personality and it will win you tons of friends. Good Luck and keep your chin up. ;) :D :cool:

~Mindy~

ZLB-
Sweetie, don't we all have days when we think we look like run over ass?? I know that some days I look in the mirror and wonder why on earth my Hunny loves me..and why on earth he says I'm beautiful. But you know what I do-it's going to sound chessy, but don't laugh-I leave myself little random notes that say, Don't forget you are so beautiful. I'll just write them here and there, and then forget about them. Always makes me feel nice. My friend laughed at me when I told her-but who cares, I like the boost of self-confidence it gives me. :p

Anyhoo-I'm not going to give you hair advice. I have a daily struggle about whether or not to cut my hair. I want it long, but always cut it short. But then I want it long again!! :rolleyes: Plus, when I get stressed, the first place I head to is the salon...maybe I should work on that being the gym....but anyhoo, chopping off my hair is stress relif, but just insures that I'll never have long hair-sob! :p