You have received some great advice re 2nd job, coupons, daycare, etc. Save as much as you can now so that you can be around to help with the newborn.

If you are willing to accept hand-me-downs, let your family, friends and neighbors (even colleagues) who have older children know. Our neighbors started leaving stuff on the front porch: baby bathtubs, bouncy chairs, maternity clothes, etc. My colleagues gave us pack-n-plays, clothes, a high chair, etc. People just wanted to get it out of their homes ;-) We received so much that we were able to give some duplicates away. In the first year you need some gear for a very limited amount of time because the baby outgrows it so fast.

Breast feeding is the best for mom and baby. But it can be frustrating at first. YOU can make a difference in how successful the mom is.

Yet another person suggesting coupons. Some libraries or such have coupon exchanges (all those involved cut out every coupon, and give those they don't need to the exchange). Friends of mine subscribe to a eletter that gives a LOT of money saving tips, like how to make wipes, using a vinyl-backed tablecloth for the floor with a toddler, and other things. I'll ask them for the site.

But I really love the suggestion baci gave you about buying something for mom. One of my treasured possessions is a china clock that my g-grandfather gave my g-grandmother on the birth of my grandmother - almost 100 years old now. Your child may appreciate that in time, too.

Hope all turns out well!

Dude grow up. I already put that behind me. I'm moving on now. If you're only going to make negative comments, why make them?

Yeah, I have. Thanks guys for your thoughts on this. This is a lot for me to take in. No one is hiring except for fast food places, so I had to fill out an app. at those places for the time being. Taco Bell called me back the same day. I have an interview with them on Tuesday. I'm in sales, so I actually have a nice job, but I know my salary is not going to cut it. After reading this and from what I've been told, it's a must that I get a second job. It will only be part time, but any extra income will help.

Kevin, thanks man. Everything you've mentioned except for the custody part was very helpful. I mentioned the custody part, because that's already a given. The court wouldn't see her as an unfit mother, so I wouldn't even waste time looking into that. So, it's plain and simple, I'll be paying child support.

Thanks again guys.

edit: also, she is not my significant other.

It varies from state to state of course, but the idea that mom automatically gets custody is completely false (at least here).

SO TRUE!!!
It gets way easier after about 2 months, but the first 2 weeks or so can be quite difficult!

You also need to consider unexpected costs. A sick child is costly if they need to go to the hospital, take expensive meds, have continual problems, etc. My daughter cost us doctors visits for normal sick kids. My son was born very sick and spent 75 days of his first year in and out of the hospital (including 20 days in the NICU). He had other hospital admissions, physical therapy, speech therapy, vision therapy, psychiatrist, tutoring to get through school, etc, BUT today he is thriving at the local community college and doing very well!

Best wishes!

DaffyKD

It's great, that you are getting second job. Hopefully she is working as long as she can during the pregnancy. If you can (and if it doesn't freak you out), go to as many appts with her as you can
Yup, the condom remark was SO uncalled for. What's done is done, and there is nothing you can do to change it, so why go there? :confused:
I know this sounds harsh, but are you going to get a DNA test?
I hope everything goes well, hon

You should really be talking to the mother of your kid about this, not asking random people on GC about this. There is no specific figure, it will vary based on where you live, where the mother lives in relation to you, whether your child is healthy, etc, etc, etc.

If you have to ask, get the second job, get yourself insurance, get a paternity test ASAP and keep it moving. You have more important things to worry about now that the opinions of an online chat community.

This is worse than spoonfeeding a clueless GLO aspirant.

How on Earth do other people figure this stuff out without GC? The wonders of the world never cease to amaze me. :)

I hear there about 8 grand on the black market. Unless you want an Asian one. Asian newborns cost more. Mostly because there are fewer of them, what with China's law about that and all.

FYI There has been a lot of news lately about used or older cribs. Some are notorious for babies getting stuck in, and there have been deaths. There have been consumer warning to not re-use a crib - there are rarely recalls a few years after a product fails (outside of cars). A lot of families use cribs over and over, which can contribute to the problem. This is something else you might want to buy new.

Always look at the "Unit Price" - the price per item/ounce/etc. Because of differences in product sizes, amounts, etc., you're not always comparing apples to apples.

Yeah...I mean, no offense to the people who have responded, but if I were planning for a kid, GC would be one of the last places I would go for advice.

Xanthus - don't you have any friends or relatives you can talk to about this?

Buy the book called Baby Bargains. It's like a super-detailed Consumer Reports for baby stuff, it's updated every 2 years. It has really broken down all of the baby gear and costs for me and my husband.

But seriously, this is not the place to be getting advice on this sort of stuff. Get some help in real life, and start getting that paternity test lined up!