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-   -   Telling the 'rents... (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=106530)

Gusteau 07-28-2009 06:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Senusret I (Post 1829947)
:eek:

Wow. So many things.

I probably should have mentioned that we're both still undergraduates because I did make it seem like its been a decade of lies or something. Regardless, the bottom line is that it's a situation that only gets worse the longer you wait. It's not advisable to leave your parents out of a lifetime commitment.

court4short 07-28-2009 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 1829948)
Just an FYI: I would not suggest lying to your parents or witholding the fact that you've joined until later on.

They are alot less likely to approve after you've lied to them about it.

I have to agree here. If you hide it from them, it only makes it seem more conspicuous. Their mindset about Greek life might become even worse if it's something you hide from them and make it even more sketchy. Ya dig?

PiKA2001 07-28-2009 08:38 PM

Is going greek really that big of a deal to some parents? I'm assuming you're 18 so just tell mom and dad you knocked a 32 year old divorcee up or that you're gay. Give them a week to stew on that then tell them you're joking and let the real cat out of the bag. Might put some things in perspective to them.

33girl 07-28-2009 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PiKA2001 (Post 1830010)
Is going greek really that big of a deal to some parents? I'm assuming you're 18 so just tell mom and dad you knocked a 32 year old divorcee up or that you're gay. Give them a week to stew on that then tell them you're joking and let the real cat out of the bag. Might put some things in perspective to them.

ha ha, I was thinking the same thing.

KSUViolet06 07-28-2009 09:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1830024)
ha ha, I was thinking the same thing.

Daughter: Mom and Dad, I have some bad news. I'm pregnant and dropping out of school.

Parents: Are you serious?! Have you lost your mind?

Daughter: No, but I did sign up for sorority recruitment next month.

Parents: Oh, um. ok. [sigh of relief]

Munchkin03 07-28-2009 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by srmom (Post 1829949)
mkose, I'm not sure which Texas school you are attending, but if it is UT, your parents will get a contract that they have to sign saying that they will pay the dues. The contract also lays out all the risk management stuff and my son's responsibilities to the fraternity.

I doubt there are many freshmen who can front the dues ($$$) for four years without their parents finding out about it, but maybe some houses let the students sign the contract.

I just know my son's doesn't - it has to be signed by us and him.

Really? There's no way my parents would have signed that agreement. Like I mentioned earlier, they aren't against Greek life, but they made it very clear to me and my sister that we were on our own as far as dues were concerned. Most of the women in my chapter paid their own dues from working an on-campus job or summer savings--granted, they were only about $350/semester. What about people whose parents didn't even pay for their tuition?

chickenoodle 07-28-2009 10:24 PM

I find the contract/agreement interesting. I'm not sure if it will apply to my Florida school, but I know for certain my mother would not sign it. I've been financially independent for several years and I anticipate paying for dues, etc. myself.

I chalk this up to being a newbie, but... if a PNM is adult enough to choose for herself/himself whether or not to pursue Greek membership (as was discussed earlier in the thread), why is it necessary to obtain the parent's signature on this contract/agreement? I'm assuming the NM is of legal age and the agreement outlines the expectations of both the organization and NM.

mkose1 07-29-2009 12:04 AM

Well I am going to UT, but if they do have us have our parents sign, i could probably go to my mom, as i've said she's the only one that knows and just wants me to be smart about it, dues are another ordeal...but i'm pretty good with money and i can work a budget, so hopefully that'll keep the struggle at a minimum. But yeah thanks for all the advise, hopefully my dad doesn't take it too hard when I tell him...

pshsx1 07-29-2009 03:43 AM

Aren't dues at UT, A&M, and Tech well over $1000?

HeavenslilAngel 07-29-2009 04:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pshsx1 (Post 1830146)
Aren't dues at UT, A&M, and Tech well over $1000?

WOW!!!! :eek: my small state school was only like 2-300 per semester.

Senusret I 07-29-2009 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gusteau (Post 1829964)
I probably should have mentioned that we're both still undergraduates because I did make it seem like its been a decade of lies or something. Regardless, the bottom line is that it's a situation that only gets worse the longer you wait. It's not advisable to leave your parents out of a lifetime commitment.

No, you didn't make it seem that way. I knew you were an undergrad.

It's pretty shameful anyway.

mkose1 07-29-2009 10:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pshsx1 (Post 1830146)
Aren't dues at UT, A&M, and Tech well over $1000?

I looked into that and it ranges from about $500/semester at one house all the way to $2500/semester at another...so i guess yeah you are right. Oh well, I can think of something...

KSUViolet06 07-29-2009 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mkose1 (Post 1830179)
I looked into that and it ranges from about $500/semester at one house all the way to $2500/semester at another...so i guess yeah you are right. Oh well, I can think of something...


Just an FYI:

Greek Life is a big financial commitment.

It is very important for you to consider whether it is something you or your family can afford BEFORE participating in recruitment or accepting a bid.

Example: if you plan on paying for it yourself, be sure you have a budget that's going to support that (i.e. that you're getting enough hours and such). If your parents are paying, be sure that they're well aware of that so they can plan ahead, etc.

mkose1 07-29-2009 11:47 AM

Oh I completely understand that, and I have a way to make things work out. I know that my parents will be sending me money monthly and are telling me to work a budget for it, I'll just budget money monthly to cover dues and other expenses. I can work with money.

DLanoliN 07-29-2009 12:13 PM

It really depends on the sitution you have with your parents. I did not tell my parents until I was innitiated. My parents came to pick me up at the end of the semester, and I had my letters on. I didn't tell them to save them worry and disapproval. It worked well in my situation to say "Hey look, I did this, I am fine, and it was a good choice for all these reasons.. etc". It ended up being a good decision for me.

However, I support myself through college. Not only did I recieve nothing from my parents to pay for my Sorority experience, I also recieved nothing to contribute to college in general. I think parents should know if they will be expected to contribute to the cost of your choice. You're an adult though, and joining the experience of Greek life is a choice you deserve to make.


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