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OK, maybe I should clarify. When I say I'm involved, I mean more than just being lavaliered. My boyfriend being in a fraternity has given me a reason to be involved. I attend many of the Greek pageants on campus, contribute either financially or otherwise to many Greek fundraisers, and help his fraternity in different aspects (i.e. cleaning before/after rush or parties, fundraising, etc)

I have no intention of talking about my boyfriend or his fraternity at sorority rush unless it is brought up to me. My lavalier I have been told by some could be a conversation piece, and by others a bad idea because of the reasons FSUZeta brought up. With the responses I have been getting, it's looking better not to wear it just so that there is no confusion on what my intentions are with recruitment.

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 1829417)

Some things:

Being lavaliered DOES NOT = being involved in Greek Life. It just means you have a bf in a fraternity, that's all. So a sorority likely isn't going to cut you for being "already involved" becaue you're not.

There are some things to consider with being lavaliered:

**Everyone knows that there are fraternities that tend to hang more with certain sororities than others (example: at one school, the DGs and Sigma Chis may hang out alot). Because of this, it sometimes happens that a sorority will assume that because you are lavaliered to a man in a certain fraternity, that you only want to be in a certain sorority because that's the one they hang out with most (whether it's true or not).

Example: Let's say your bf is a Sigma Chi and they hang out the most with DG, during recruitment, it's possible that other sororities may assume "Let's cut her because she's lavaliered to a Sigma Chi, so she probably only wants to be a DG."

**Also, spending time at a certain fraternity sometimes makes girls think that because they are lavaliered to a ___, that they are guaranteed a bid certain sorority. Example: You may be lavaliered to a Sigma Chi whose chapter hangs out the most with DG. So you assume "I'm going to get into DG because my bf is a Sigma Chi." That's not true.

Some more advice for lavaliered PNMs:

*Please don't talk about your bf, his fraternity, or being lavaliered over and over again. It's annoying and it doesn't tell the sororities anything about YOU. Most would say that it's not really appropriate to talk about boys/boyfriends AT ALL.

*Be mindful of your behavior around your bf's faternity house. There are probably some sorority members hanging out there, and you're probably friends with them. All the more reason for you to make sure to keep it classy when you're at fraternity parties and such. Don't be a drunken scene, yell, scream, cause drama, etc. The sorority members WILL notice you, in a bad way.

*Be mindful of yoursel when partying around sorority members. Sometimes all it takes is one drunken (or sober) misunderstanding between girls to negatively affect your recruitment.

Example: You accidentally spill your drink on Amy Alpha. You say sorry, but she thinks you said something else and gives you a dirty look. You are confused and you give her a dirty look back. She then goes back to the rest of the Alphas and says "that girl barefootbeauty is such a beeyotch, she gave me a dirty look at Sigma Chi last night!!" They all spread the word to other sisters, and your chances of being an Alpha are affected.

Things get even more interesting if Amy Alpha decides to tell her friends in OTHER sororities about "the incident." You get the idea.

KSU makes some great points, but then again, I think she may be wise beyond her years.

KSU I read your recruitment story today. I enjoyed it! Thank you. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by barefootbeauty (Post 1829464)

I have no intention of talking about my boyfriend or his fraternity at sorority rush unless it is brought up to me. My lavalier I have been told by some could be a conversation piece, and by others a bad idea because of the reasons FSUZeta brought up. With the responses I have been getting, it's looking better not to wear it just so that there is no confusion on what my intentions are with recruitment.

One of the things that doesn't get talked about at rush parties is boys. This pretty much puts "boy" in everyone's face. I will never forget the girl who showed up at a rush party wearing her boyfriend's letter sweatshirt (apparently she thought she was above the dress code because they were lavaliered). We cut her immediately, even though the fraternity was one we hung out with a lot.

Just leave the lavalier at home. It can be taken too many different ways and most of them are not good - especially at a large school where the majority of sorority members won't know you.

isnt the topic of boys something we shouldnt really talk about it anyways, just in case or something? kinda like you dont want to talk about religion, booze, and stuff at the parties, you never know who might get offended or take something the wrong way, and also talking about how much one drinks isnt very lady like.

Quote:

Originally Posted by redsweetpea (Post 1830217)

isnt the topic of boys something we shouldnt really talk about it anyways, just in case or something? kinda like you dont want to talk about religion, booze, and stuff at the parties, you never know who might get offended or take something the wrong way, and also talking about how much one drinks isnt very lady like.

YES.

You could bring up your boyfriend at a chapter, and the girl you're talking to might HATE that fraternity and think they're a bunch of douchebags. Or she may have dated one and decided that she now hates them all. You just never know.