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Quote:

Originally posted by Amaterasu

And now I am just more confused. I have done my research, and decided I click, but I feel like I just don't have the same opportunities as these women who come from long lines of ABC or XYZ org and whose mothers have sorority sisters to write them recommendations and the like. I know ONE graduate member of the organization that I am interested in and have no idea if she is financial, and it's not because I lack community service or anything like that -- I have just only happened to have come across one, and I developed a relationship with her as a mentor and counselor. At the time her Greek affiliation didn't really strike me as anything because I barely knew what a Greek was.

Do you still keep in touch with her? Would she be willing to mentor and counsel you through this process as well?

Are some of these posts for real? :confused: :eek: :rolleyes:

Quote:

Originally posted by AKA2D '91
Are some of these posts for real? :confused: :eek: :rolleyes:

What parts are you having trouble believing?

(I ask that honestly - not facetiously)

Quote:

Originally posted by IotaNet
What parts are you having trouble believing?

(I ask that honestly - not facetiously)

Silly me. That should have been posted as a Random Spurt. Wrong thread. Wrong forum. *smirk* *grin*

I understand where you're coming from BUT, be careful how you present yourself. I am hoping that you don't go around talking like this. I come from a similar background but I didn't let that stop me from talking to and making friends with everybody when I was in college and even up to the present. Be your proud self and people will always respect you.

Quote:

Originally posted by Amaterasu
I'm non-Greek...I guess I'll share...

I suppose my biggest apprehension is sort of being unknowing. I mean, I guess I feel like BGLOs (or elite black groups in general) aren't very...welcoming to students who don't have legacy or family history. It's like not only does it matter who you are, but also who your parents and your parents' parents are. For someone like me -- I'm definitely working-class; I am THE FIRST person in my family to attend college traditionally (mother received her nursing certificate from a tech school before I entered; after I went in, she started pursuing her bachelor's); my family hasn't done anything particularly significant in the community, nor do they have a lot of money. Most of their associates also aren't graduates of college, much less sorority/fraternity members. So I never had the privilege of doing Jack & Jill, debutante cotillions, or societies like those in school.

Now I am at an HBCU where it seems most of the students are upper-middleclass (as the school is notorious for skimpy financial aid). Most of my friends are "legacies" of my school, have mothers and fathers who are members of sororities/fraternities, were in Jack & Jill, their parents are Links or Boules, and they have the money...I had never even HEARD of Jack & Jill before I came to this college. And I had heard of sororities/fraternities but really didn't know what they are.

And now I am just more confused. I have done my research, and decided I click, but I feel like I just don't have the same opportunities as these women who come from long lines of ABC or XYZ org and whose mothers have sorority sisters to write them recommendations and the like. I know ONE graduate member of the organization that I am interested in and have no idea if she is financial, and it's not because I lack community service or anything like that -- I have just only happened to have come across one, and I developed a relationship with her as a mentor and counselor. At the time her Greek affiliation didn't really strike me as anything because I barely knew what a Greek was.

And I know (now anyway) that these groups require a recommendation from an active, financial soror. I mean, how are you supposed to meet these members if you grew up in an environment such as I did? I know next to nothing about the actual intake process -- I didn't know about the not wearing of the colors thing or the "go to all of their events!" thing. I mean, some of it seemed common sense, and I participated in things because I WANTED to and not just because I wanted to join XYZ, but...

So I guess I what I want to say is...too often the assumption is that students know the correct protocol to follow for applying to and getting accepted to the org of choice. They think you know stuff. But even the very basic things, like not wearing the colors to RUSH or not saying "I've wanted to be an XYZ since high school" may seem to be common sense, but may not be so common to those who haven't been exposed. I know that the secrecy of the org is part of what makes it so special, but I wish there were more information disseminated about what it takes to become an XYZ, and what they actually do for the community.

And the graduate chapters in my area don't seem to be very involved with the undergraduates, which I would like to see. It seems like there's a huge gap between grad chapters and undergrad chapters -- their missions, their philosophies, their ideas. Everyone tells me, "You should ask your questions to grads because they will be nicer." Well, why is that?

Thank you southernelle for your advice. As for the question about my counselor...when I go back to visit my old high school I always make a point of seeing her, and when I was in high school we were closer because she was the one who encouraged me to choose the college I wanted to attend, and not just go to a community/public state college because my mother and father wanted me to do that. But it's not really like we email back and forth or anything like that...

As for Blue Reign...I'm not exactly sure what you meant when you said "I am hopng that you don't go around talking like this..." I appreciate your advice, but do you mean that I shouldn't be talking about how I feel? I am not speaking of any organization in particular but just my lack of knowledge about the actual process, and that's not because of lack of research. And trust me, my background has not stopped me from getting involved in every possible thing I can handle with time and still be dedicated to and participate wholeheartedly, regardless of whether I want to join a Greek or not. I am always my proud self, and I don't feel like I should have to...I don't want to say hide or change, because those are strong words. But sometimes I suppose it feels like I have to shoehorn myself into a "stereotype"...and I don't want to do that.

Quote:

Originally posted by Amaterasu
Thank you southernelle for your advice. As for the question about my counselor...when I go back to visit my old high school I always make a point of seeing her, and when I was in high school we were closer because she was the one who encouraged me to choose the college I wanted to attend, and not just go to a community/public state college because my mother and father wanted me to do that. But it's not really like we email back and forth or anything like that...

As for Blue Reign...I'm not exactly sure what you meant when you said "I am hopng that you don't go around talking like this..." I appreciate your advice, but do you mean that I shouldn't be talking about how I feel? I am not speaking of any organization in particular but just my lack of knowledge about the actual process, and that's not because of lack of research. And trust me, my background has not stopped me from getting involved in every possible thing I can handle with time and still be dedicated to and participate wholeheartedly, regardless of whether I want to join a Greek or not. I am always my proud self, and I don't feel like I should have to...I don't want to say hide or change, because those are strong words. But sometimes I suppose it feels like I have to shoehorn myself into a "stereotype"...and I don't want to do that.

Amaterasu,

You have stated some particular things your post that can possibly suggest to many members of the greek community which organization you are speaking of.

Have you searched our boards on stuff like these issues? Because if you have, notes do get shared by all the NPHC BGLO's sororities...

What can I say, it sounds like you attend a HBCU--a very popular one at that. You are an outsider looking in. You have no exposure to the bourgiousie. But how are your grades? Do you participate in the "Debate Club" for example? How are your oratory skills, your networking skills, your knowledge in academia skills? If you are really about the learning, the reason why you are going to college in the first place, then the questions is why would you really want to be a part of a sorority? What purpose will it serve you and how will you serve it?

There is only one specific legal way to enter at least my Sorority based on information I have just gotten from my International Headquarters. That is the ONLY WAY you are to follow at this time. Any other way you heard of that is not written on a bonafide sheet of paper--practically notarized--and you have had to signed for that information at a designated time from an official older member of my Sorority is NOT the way...

I am saying this statement because, YES, the members of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. do have to be that hardcore about it...

*laughs* I was trying kinda hard to not give away what campus I was on or what group I wanted to join...lol

Thanks ladies/guys for all of your advice, and in answer to your questions...yes to just about all of them. I do get involved on campus (so much it almost kills me lol) and I am about the learning, but I believe that a sorority is a lifelong commitment, and I'd like to have that home-base of women who not only gather for social aspects but also for service-based aspects...a group who enjoys the same things I enjoy.

However, I don't want to take the topic too far from the original purpose...I just wanted to comment on somethings that were personal to me. And yes, I do attend a popular HBCU ^_^

I think the numbers of Black Greeks are going back to historical numbers

If you look at the intake numbers of BGLO's over the COURSE of their history, it wasn't until the late 80's that there was HUGE increases in membership. A decline in memberships is not necessarily a bad thing if the QUALITY of those applying doesn't decline. A decline in membership is only a BAD thing if those being initiated aren't at the top of their game.

^^^^

True, but huge numbers are not happening at all schools where there are NPHC chapters. But, this does not indicate an overall decline.

Take my alma mater, Texas A&M which is 97% white. I was told that at a recent Delta interest meeting there were 30 young women who showed up. At a HBCU you would see at least three times that number.

As I have said before, alot has to do with the chapter at a particular school and/or the presence of grad members in the community for the grad / alumnae chapters. If the presence of the chapter is strong and positive, then the chapter will more than likely attract people, if the opposite then the chapter may not.

Quote:

Originally posted by Jody
I think the numbers of Black Greeks are going back to historical numbers

If you look at the intake numbers of BGLO's over the COURSE of their history, it wasn't until the late 80's that there was HUGE increases in membership. A decline in memberships is not necessarily a bad thing if the QUALITY of those applying doesn't decline. A decline in membership is only a BAD thing if those being initiated aren't at the top of their game.

Welcome back! :D :p

I have to agree with dardenr. I am not a member of a sorority on my campus but I was interested at one point. I am very involved on my campus, I hold office in the Student Government Association, and the local NAACP among others, I hold a 3.7 GPA, I am double majoring and minoring, I was voted Homecomg Queen, I've held two internships with two Fortune 500 companies, and I have plans to own my own business one day.
Since I was a little girl I wanted to join a specific sorority but sadly, I found that the pledging process was not in line with my morals and ideas. I am a leader on my campus and a mentor to high school kids, and I never want anyone to question my good character. Unfortunatly the BLack sororities on and around my campus have been labeled with terms that in no way implies what these organizations were founded as. So I have to say dardenr, in my community you have hit the nail over the head. My closest friends are beautful, intelligent, leaders on my campus. They are presidents and founders of many black groups and we would love to share our gifts with a black sorority if it did not mean being abused physically or mentally. Frankly, we know we can be successful without it. Although we have considered forming a new sorority we still have one last hope, there are no AKA's on my campus so maybe in the future...

Re: I am turned off

Quote:

Originally posted by dotts
I have to agree with dardenr. I am not a member of a sorority on my campus but I was interested at one point. I am very involved on my campus, I hold office in the Student Government Association, and the local NAACP among others, I hold a 3.7 GPA, I am double majoring and minoring, I was voted Homecomg Queen, I've held two internships with two Fortune 500 companies, and I have plans to own my own business one day.
Since I was a little girl I wanted to join a specific sorority but sadly, I found that the pledging process was not in line with my morals and ideas. I am a leader on my campus and a mentor to high school kids, and I never want anyone to question my good character. Unfortunatly the BLack sororities on and around my campus have been labeled with terms that in no way implies what these organizations were founded as. So I have to say dardenr, in my community you have hit the nail over the head. My closest friends are beautful, intelligent, leaders on my campus. They are presidents and founders of many black groups and we would love to share our gifts with a black sorority if it did not mean being abused physically or mentally. Frankly, we know we can be successful without it. Although we have considered forming a new sorority we still have one last hope, there are no AKA's on my campus so maybe in the future...

maybe in the future indeed... good luck

Well, I know at my college, greek life in general is actually really popular. The stats say around half the students are in some kind of greek organizations. Our APhiA's and Sigmas crossed pretty large lines this semester (10 and 11 respectively). However, it looks like it's a major problem w/ paper members, just in it to make themselves popular. Some pretty much become wut I like to call "fraternal clones" and they've pretty much drained almost all their personality off of their org. That seems to have turned a few ppl off. Also, it's been A LOT of drama b/w organizations. The AKA's and Deltas have gotten in a fight, and the Alphas have gotten in almost 3 fights this semester. ALSO, the AKA's came under fire for hazing, and some of my friends that wanted to pledge AKA were turned off by that and they're not even goin greek now. I mean, I'm still interested in pledging, but my biggest fear is gettin sucked into the mess of rival greek orgs. But it's just a lot of factors voting against the future of BGLOs. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if some of them didn't make it to a 2nd centennial.

Quote:

Originally posted by tp2005
Well, I know at my college, greek life in general is actually really popular. The stats say around half the students are in some kind of greek organizations. Our APhiA's and Sigmas crossed pretty large lines this semester (10 and 11 respectively). However, it looks like it's a major problem w/ paper members, just in it to make themselves popular. Some pretty much become wut I like to call "fraternal clones" and they've pretty much drained almost all their personality off of their org. That seems to have turned a few ppl off. Also, it's been A LOT of drama b/w organizations. The AKA's and Deltas have gotten in a fight, and the Alphas have gotten in almost 3 fights this semester. ALSO, the AKA's came under fire for hazing, and some of my friends that wanted to pledge AKA were turned off by that and they're not even goin greek now. I mean, I'm still interested in pledging, but my biggest fear is gettin sucked into the mess of rival greek orgs. But it's just a lot of factors voting against the future of BGLOs. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if some of them didn't make it to a 2nd centennial.

This statement really makes me think that basically you are damned if you do and damned if you don't. People will criticize you if you haze and then they would criticize you if you don't and they will can you paper. If you only do the required amount of community service, people will say you should do more. If you do tons of community service, people will say they don't want to join because greeks will take away their time from studying. People will always find a reason to be turned off with greek life no matter what you do. I just think greeks in general should just make sure they live up to the principles of their organization and not to listen to what others will say. If you all think you are doing your best and your national officers are pleased with you, that is all that matters.