I didn't mean you, I meant if the mother thinks her daughter is covered solely by having a police whistle and pepper spray, she's deluding herself. All women need to know how to combat the physical, mental and emotional forms of assault.

I don't see it as gender based. Of course men precipitate their own victimization, in lots of ways. Who doesn't think that?

It IS possible to view a victim (male or female) with empathy while simultaneously recognizing what they could do differently to avoid becoming a victim. How do humans ever learn from their mistakes otherwise if it's out of bounds to mention that?

Personally, I know I "preached" to my sons way more than I ever did my daughter. Their childhood and college years were filled with "please don't eat the daisies" moments where my imagination failed to keep up with the things they could think up that could put their lives in danger.

Millions of people around the world. The average man college student doesn't get a lecture about safe behaviors to reduce the likelihood of violent victimization. The average woman college student gets tons of lectures.

All discussions of sexual assault and rape are gender based. That is highlighted in many posts in this thread.

Not at all. Both parents are recently retired US Diplomats and as such have been in many very different (and often dangerous) parts of the world and in many different circumstances. Mother went over with daughter her normal routine and identified with her vulnerabilities. One glaring one was walking home to her apartment by herself in the dark after a late class. She got herself a bike to be able to travel at a greater speed then added pepper spray and a police whistle on a cord. No guarantees of complete safety, but she does have some defenses in place. Predators of all kinds prey on the vulnerable, as we know.

Yes, this.

But it's also necessary to be able to assess risk with some semblance of accuracy. With our 24/7 news cycle that loves to sensationalize, people have a hard time with this. Remember the recent Ebola frenzy? And a few years ago it was the shark frenzy. In the 80's it was the daycare child molester frenzy. And we've had the rape crisis frenzy for a while. Rape is a problem, and not just on college campuses. But hysteria doesn't lead to effective policy decisions to combat it.

Well, duh. You've jumpd the shark if you think any of what's being discussed here is applicable to an Afghanistan or a Rwanda.

When you say men don't get lectures about violent victimization risk reduction, can you be specific on what you mean by violent victimization?

Are you dumb enough to think that "millions of people around the world" does not include millions of people in the USA?

Get your head out of your ass.

No, but I can go back to typing about a general topic rather than responding to honorgal.

Good grief.

I can't speak to the vast majority, but that's true of me, anyway. I've both raped and been raped if that's rape. You tell your partner you aren't in the mood, the partner gets undressed and tries to be seductive, it works, and consensual sex happens without the verbal "no" ever being withdrawn. If the seduction doesn't work to change your mood, you say, "Nice try, honey, maybe tomorrow."

As far as my boyfriend is concerned, if we're in bed together and he pulls my panties down, and I just watch silently, that means "yes, keep going."

And there are women and men who are silent because being vocal or making gestures of disapproval could result in a much more painful experience.

This is a flashback to rape accusations being dismissed if the woman (or man) alleged victim orgasms.

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I don't know if this article has been posted:

Rape culture on campus: The silence of men

Don't pretend you didn't precipitate that.

What really gets me is the message to young women. It's overwhelmingly that they have no agency, no ability to say no, no ability to take care of themselves, to prevent becoming a victim. What in the world has happened to feminism? Depressing.

I'm not pretending. I didn't.

. Undoubtably, there are. But you are not going to be able to change that by redefining and branding the vast majority of sexual encounters in healthy relationships as rape.

I wonder what came of this "movement" since 2011?

http://www.calcasa.org/wp-content/up...e-of-Rape1.pdf

That is not what is happening. Don't worry. People whose consensual sexual encounters involve silent consent will not be prevented from getting their rocks off.