Amen KSU! Relationships take time...even in sororities. Everyone sees girls hugging and squealing on bid day, but that's just the beginning. Friendships form when you're studying together, doing service work in the rain, bonding over TV marathons, discussing formal dates and swapping dresses...this isn't instantaneous. Especially in such big chapters! My sorority was tiny and it still took me a while to meet people and really make friends. Don't give up the opportunity to participate in something that has the potential to change your life for a bad reason or for one bad day. Think about this as a lifetime investment, because it is! I'm still close with many of my sisters from almost 20 years ago.

:) KSUViolet- Love what you said there! I hope my D can find that in her choice. Hoping all the girls can realize that the tier thing at IU is just a bunch of noise and finding a sisterhood is really what it is all about.

My D says she feels like she needs another winter break, or at least a soak in a hot bath. But homework calls...

I wish every PNM could read this ❤️ Thanks for sharing KSUViolet, and *winter* My daughter is just one year in, but I feel these same branches beginning to grow.

I went through recruitment at IU my sophomore year, but my roommate (both freshman and sophomore year) joined a sorority freshman year. It ultimately made my decision difficult, because I was deciding whether or not to rank her chapter first after preference round. I ended up with a bid to my chapter but our friendship didn't suffer one bit. In a way, I gained a second set of sisters through spending so much time with her sorority. I spent nights at the house, went to their formals with her (and her mine!), and we supported each other's philanthropy events. Having different experiences and stories to share was fun! She is still my absolute best friend.

I hope your daughter loves the chapter that she ends up joining, and she gets to see how other sororities work and meet new people through her friends! It really is the best of both worlds.

Thank you! Great way of looking at the situation. I think she was feeling better by the end of the night, and spreading out is good for her. I think her solo status dawned on her in the early evening, and combined with being completely drained, caused her to be a little testy. She just wanted to get to her homework and go to bed!

I am trying to avoid the anxious "what if she doesn't get a bid??" thinking that seems to creep in at the end and trust the process. Looking forward to her getting her answer and moving ahead with this next chapter (ha! punny) of her time at IU.

Clayton117 - It is my understanding that as long as your daughter ranked both of her houses (and did not suicide), she will get one of her two choices.

Somebody mentioned something about live streaming Bid Night. That would be so fun to see!

I am so glad I found this site and thanks again to everyone who posted. You all have great advice.

Wishing all pnms happiness tomorrow!

I wish all our daughters happiness in what house they get back...ours had an Orgo test this morning so this weekend was both exciting and devastating, emotional rollercoaster ride and lots of introspection needed to get through. I hope it all works out. It is so hard to hear them cry, and my girl is a tough broad so that is how emotional it is! The bruised feelings from being romanced then dropped at the end is hard but builds resilience!!

I have to say, this IU recruitment isn't a walk in the park. Friends who have kids in smaller schools with less competitive Greek systems have no idea what is going on at schools like Indiana. I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards:confused: I can't even imagine how much more it is amped up in the Southern schools. My husband attended another Big 10 school and was in a fraternity, and he is astonished by the differences, not to mention how different it is from frat rush in general.

I think it has taught the girls a lot of lessons along the way, and has forced them out of their comfort zones: to dig deep, to find strength and confidence and resilience. I told my D this morning how proud I am of her for keeping a cool head and an open mind, and for practicing some analytical thinking, as well as listening to her gut instincts. Whether the girls find a chapter to call home or decide this Greek life isn't for them, I think they all learned something about themselves in the process.

And yes, I have gathered they are to get a bid if they maximized their options along the way, but there always seems to be a story about someone that it didn't work out for...that usually ends up being someone who didn't want the choices they were left with at the end though? My daughter is getting the impression there are a lot of girls "suiciding" this year, against the recommendations of their RGs. Hopefully it works out for those girls, or there will be more of those stories of the bid-less this cycle.

I have a question for those experts on the new system...If our daughter ranked Sorority A first, then Sorority B second...and she is not high enough on the list of A to get a bid - I understand they look at sorority B’s list and if she is not high enough on their list she doesn’t get a bid. She is then open for QA but what does that mean? Do they go back to Sorority A and see where she was on list and see if they can take another girl? Or do they go back to any house that is offering QA and it could be one she ranked higher but didn’t get asked back to Pref night? Sorry I am just trying to figure out how this may turn out for her...Thank you all for the advice!

At the risk of being immodest, I think it a good time to remind y'all of this stickied thread: "I Didn't Get My First Choice; It Gets Better". http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...d.php?t=121412

It's a computer program and a litttle more complicated than that. They will run the names for Group A until the women match elsewhere or A fills up. Once all groups are filled or all matches have gone as far as they can go, then they do QAs. QAs are typically matched to the smallest of the groups they listed but she would be placed with one of those two if at all possible. Snap bids can given to women who do not place and some other group lists them on their list...hope this helps.

For those mentioning a live stream, last year a reporter at Indiana Daily Student News was at the tennis courts and live tweeted the event. I got a Twitter account just so I could follow it! He is @petejtalbot. You can pull up the tweets from January 16, 2018 to see what it looked like. So much fun! I hope everyone has a great time tomorrow!

" I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards"

This always cracks me up! I often wonder if the people who ask that question either weren't involved in Greek life so really have no clue, or attended a school with fewer than 4 sororities... because really, how is this even a question???

SWTXBelle~That was a great thread. Perfect timing to read those stories. Thanks for sharing!