Well, that's not the argument that I would make, but it's probably not realistic to expect to effect much of a change in the general tone.

I suppose you can make a small difference by showing up and posting the responses that you think the OPs deserve, but lecturing other users just results in flame wars, and nobody ends up looking good.

Some of the worst train wreck threads seem to have "you guys are mean, mean bullies" as one of the recurring themes. It doesn't seem to help with the general image of Greek Life for everyone to look unhinged, in the name of kindness especially.

Just post your ideas but don't expect to control others, unless it's by inspiring example.

Ok, last post, I promise.

I will say it again, I am APPALLED. And not just on this thread, so many of the threads I have been reading are the same offenders just bitching people out and telling them they suck, their daughters suck, their grammar sucks, they don't know how to be a parent, that they aren't going to get the sorority they want, etc, etc.

I read LMV's posts from day 1 and think she is entitled to her own opinion and deserves to be supported by the people who choose to read her posts. She didn't come here to get bashed, she just wanted to share her story. I personally was not offended by anything she said, nor will I be, even if something negative is/was said about my house. Chapters are as different as all of us are...Even though I think my house is awesome at my particular college, that doesn't mean that everyone else thinks that or that my same house is good at other colleges. Maybe I am not as into it, I don't know. That's just me.

So I am sorry if that seems self righteous - but I would rather be self righteous than hurtful to someone, especially someone I don't know who is young and vulnerable.

Ciao!

How on earth did this fun, entertaining thread (at least from the outside) started by an amusing (if initially misdirected) PNM turn into a trainwreck of alumnae from outstanding fraternities feeding on each other? Ya'll are stressin' me out! I'm bugging out until Sunday and will check back in to see how it turns out, LMV.

I don't think people have a blanket expectation of support here or elsewhere.

I'd institute a basic expectation of polite treatment if I ran the show, but I don't.

But I think you can expect to get back basically the same attitude that you project here.

The OP was pretty critical of many of the chapters, so it seems a little silly to expect that everyone was obligated to support and affirm her.

But I also don't think she's the kind of person who is really bothered by random internet criticism, so very little harm is done.

As I've said several times, it was a fun thread to read and I hope she gets a bid that she wants, but I wouldn't describe her approach to recruitment or posting a recruitment story as exemplary, and apparently, she's realized that too.

popcorn anyone???

I'm so confused!! :eek::rolleyes:

Recruitment thread!!!! Please!

I've got no recruitment story here - so far, it's been deleted, not that there's anything wrong with that. Recruitment just started back up today so my source there is no good for a little while. One of the chapters I work with starts today and there's nothing there yet. Recruitment at my new grad school starts this weekend but I don't have any ties here so it's more of a relief that I'm not involved b/c I should be doing school work.

Reruns are still on TV. I'm dying my hair to treat myself and satisfy boredom on a Friday night.

I may just have to post my retro-recruitment thread at UIUC just to take care of my own excitement. :p

I don't think it's going to go that way, but I might be wrong.

I'm certainly not that fired up by it.

This just seems like a weird, weird place to make an argument for kindness to the OP. (not that she doesn't deserve it; she does as much as anyone)

But it wasn't a particularly kind thread from the very first description of rounds.

I think that's what most of us liked about it.

Humor me!:D

Are you the same poster who jumped all over me in this thread?

I would just like the thread to go back to what was supposed to be....a recruitment story. yes she has her opinions and is probably going the wrong way about them....but honestly all this bickering and crap is annoying.

And people wonder why GCer's who used to post all the time no longer or very rarely do....its not the same place it used to be.

Is that the one where you called someone out for basically being illiterate?

Probably.

I'm trying to make clear that I'm pro-kindness; I've just learned from personally experience that calling people out with mini-lectures hasn't been effective in the past.

It might work with a few of us, like you and me*, but generally, it's not going to be successful, and it's likely to explode.

How do I know this? Because I've done it.

ETA: * I mean that you are I are receptive to being reminded to be kind, even if we don't like being called for it.

EATA: I know that I made a couple of now-deleted posts to the effect that karma would probably take care of the situation early in this thread, but I honestly don't think I'm pro-meanness or pro-rudeness generally. I might be kidding myself.

I remember it as the thread in which the OP posted borderline cruel remarks about some of the chapters in an almost incomprehensible manner. Actually, it was much like this one except this one is easier to read and in the other the OP pledged AGD. I find it interesting that you have been very critical in this thread of how some posters choose their battles. Maybe you are trying to say that you have "evolved" since then - or whatever the proper term should be.

I will - but during the "slow season" (Nov/Dec) - before I moved I was at my parents house and found my rush guide with all my notes. It was hilarious. I'm going back to visit soon and I'll pick it up then.

I just moved and started grad school after 7 years in the working world to make a career change so I'm still adjusting and *need* to be doing school at the moment. (which is why I'm here, clearly :))

My recruitment thread is full of DRA-MA so it will be long and it's a better ending than I could have hoped (11 years later) so I want to do it justice.

Maybe I just cut the other poster too much slack and couldn't take the heat from AlphaFrog about the secondary legacy issue in the thread.

I didn't remember the other poster being critical of some of the chapters, but honestly, it might have been because I couldn't follow the thread that well, and I guess you knew the chapters involved so you could, maybe?

I find this thread a weird place for the kindness to the OP debate to flare up.

I don't want the OP to be treated poorly, honestly, but I'm not sure her opinions about chapters are worth this appeal for deference and support. I think we all ought to be nice, but there's been on going sass and snark from the OP. I think she can handle mixing it up and kind of likes it. I didn't get that vibe from the learning disabled poster of the other thread.

In the other thread the OP went and edited her posts. She removed her reference to the fat sorority and other such remarks.

And just to calrify, I went to UIUC (this thread) not Oregon State (other thread) so that had nothing to do with my reaction to that poster's remarks.

Anyway, this was a total hijack. Sorry.