IUH88 -- why can't 21 be moved back to October? I can see the challenge of Nov/Dec parties. Or -- and I am opening Pandora's box -- is there a reason IU can't move to August recruitment ?

While I see the irony, I also see the hurt and disappointment. My daughter is going to finish the process with an open mind and give the three sororities another look. Too bad she doesn't have a chance to give the sororities at the top of a list another look at her.

If housing wasn't what it is at IU perhaps they could, but when you have 19 out of 21 sororities requiring their members to live in their houses for 2 if not 3 years, it's hard not to look past not having a house.

Although the weather is no one's fault, the revised schedule was not optimal and did a huge disservice to all involved. Everyone can say it's hard on the actives, but they're already in a house and they're self-esteem isn't taking a hit.

No true reason we can't move to August recruitment, other than that we use grade cuts as a way to narrow down the large PNM pool (unless I'm forgetting something). But excluding that as an option...

Oct 21 party with post-Xmas: you then have 3 months between when PNMs first meet actives and they have to come back again. Definitely wasn't an ideal situation, and created many opportunities for dirty rushing.

Personally, I think the best option is to go back to the split of 21 pre-Xmas and the rest post-Xmas, but put 21 party the weekend (or 2, depending on football) before Thanksgiving that way you avoid the dead week issue.

Thanks. Maybe Panhell will consider the prior arrangement you described. : )

Are there any dorms that could be taken over by the newer chapters as housing?

And we come full circle to bed rush. : / August recruitment seems that it could work (and deferred recruitment work better) if the PNM pool did not have to be dramatically reduced.

Sorry for the long post / vent...

After hearing horror stories from other parents and thoroughly reading this and other forums, I thought my daughter and I were both prepared for the hell that is Sorority Recruitment, and especially IU Sorority Recruitment (even without the weather-induced schedule changes). She knew she would need to keep an open mind, and she knew that the process would likely end up in disappointment.

But when I talked to her last night she was so excited and so positive about how things went at 12-party, and I couldn't help getting excited for her, and I encouraged her excitement. She told me details of conversations and it sounded like she had really made a deep connection in a short amount of time - in one conversation both she and the Active teared up over a common bond they discussed. At another sorority, as she was leaving the Active said "we really hope you will consider us".

Then came the phone call this morning - hysterical sobs. Her situation is a bit different from most of the posts this morning - she did get matched with one sorority she really liked, but we both know that she has about a 0.01% chance of actually getting a bid from them (having to do with religion ;) ). The other matches were her bottom two. We both thought we were prepared for this, but yesterday was just so positive that she got her hopes up for her two favorite sororities (she's a legacy at both), so the disappointment this morning was huge. I know, I know, we were warned. It's to be expected. It's just so darn hard :,( She says she will keep an open mind about one of the bottom two, but the other one she just felt no connection with anyone she talked to. I encouraged her to keep an open mind about all three.

Which brings me to a question… I've seen many suggestions that the girls should list all of their pref round chapters on their MRABA. But isn't that silly if you just didn't feel any connection to one or two of the sororities? I guess that's up to each PNM to decide - whether being in any sorority is better than no sorority. And then there's the DPhiE colonization that complicates things. The expansion is positive and exciting, but many girls will have a tough choice on Tuesday - do I accept a bid from a sorority where I don't feel that "connection" or do I take my chances with DPhiE? I know this will be a factor in my daughters decision and I have no idea which way she'll go.

My daughter is lucky to have a very sweet roommate. When she called me sobbing this morning, I could hear her roommate in the background, consoling her. But her roommate, who was going through recruitment just for the experience and didn't plan to join a sorority, got matched with two of her favorites. I can picture the scene on Tuesday night. I think you know what I'm talking about...

I did read some of your posts to her this morning, and I think they made her feel a bit better. Thank you for that! She pulled herself together and hopefully was able to get rid of the puffy eyes before her first party.

I really can't complain about the last-minute change in the recruitment schedule. They had to make a decision very quickly about how to handle the weather situation, and I don't think there were any good options. It definitely was grueling and far from ideal, but I don't see how it would give one PNM an advantage over another. I really can't complain about how sorority recruitment works in general - it is a hard, ego-crushing process at any university. But I CAN complain about IU's unique bed-quota system. It is a blemish on an otherwise outstanding university. I know it can't be changed overnight, but I really wish the chapters would consider at least gradually increasing their pledge class sizes and allowing more live-outs. I think the benefits would FAR outweigh the disadvantages for everyone.

And to the sorority where the Active said "we really hope you will consider us" and then didn't ask her back, that bothers me - why would they say that when they don't intend to consider you?

Thanks for listening to my vent :)

The point is that a physical building does not make a group a sorority. Sisterhood, and all the things that go along with it, make it so. We understand the differences between campuses, but just because you think these chapters are "more like clubs," doesn't mean that they are.

In some cases, they may have a stronger chapter and sisterhood than the housed sororities.

(sorry I'm just jumping into this convo.. I've been on vacation and I'm trying to catch up! :) )

I am posting ftom my cell so please forgive the typos. I am out of town but wanted to make a few breif comments. First to any PNMs and PNM moms, yes this is abrutal process but the hurt will pass. I know it is not ideal, but until the IU Panhellenic votes for chamge, all points about bed rush amd party structure are moot. Also, the two unhoused chapters were.given the option to have dorm floors somewhere but they turned it down. They did not want that. IU plans to add.mpte chapters, as they do there will be more unhoused chapters, so it be such an oddity.

If you know this isn't true, you shouldn't be lamenting your daughter getting pref invitations to chapters without houses. She may be disappointed, but you know that she can have a good experience in an unhoused group.

I'm sorry for your daughter and the other PNMs. The system at IU is painful.

Quote: And to the sorority where the Active said "we really hope you will consider us" and then didn't ask her back, that bothers me - why would they say that when they don't intend to consider you?"


I don't feel qualified to speak to your other concerns, but as to this - the active may very well have been very enthusiastic about your daughter, but the chapter as a whole didn't share her opinion. Chapters always have to cut girls they may wish to consider, but the numbers simply mean they have to cut.

I hope your daughter has a happy outcome. The biggest question for her is - would she rather not be Greek at all rather than consider a sorority which she may not yet "feel a connection", but which believes her to be a good fit?

Good luck.

I am picturing alums and actives of the IU sororities sitting back and congratulating themselves on their special snowflake situation and snottily telling the administration and NPC, "Sorry, we're unique and this is how we do it."

And then years later, their daughters get cut from recruitment.

I asked an IU alum about it and she said that she knows that recruitment is awful, she can't imagine having a system where the chapter members don't live in the house for all of college. She was adamant that she didn't want a system where some members could only live in the house for a year or two years.

And she's familiar with the pain of having a legacy cut. Her sister was cut from their legacy chapter at Arkansas, despite my friend, her older sister, and her mom all being in the same GLO.

If being in a GLO is that important, don't go to IU.

This. As much as I know the system is awful, I don't want a system where only one PC lives in

In most systems I know of, at least 2 pledge classes live in with a fair amount of upperclassmen too.

I know about bed rush too. Arkansas still had it when I rushed and maybe 1/3 of the rushees were able to get bids. This created major anti-Greek animosity for decades and cost the system hundreds of fabulous women every year. Yes, hundreds.

The current system provides the best possible experience for the members, according to my friend. The cost, though, is that it provides a terrible experience for a lot of PNMs.