OMG. As if women didn't have enough to worry about without worrying that her labia weren't tight enough.

I am pretty certain that however tight or flabby you are down there is purely genetic and there is no non surgical method of altering that.

Sheesh.

You guys come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, so do we. We live with it, and trust me, sometimes those shapes and sizes are truly on the bizarre side (there's a thread on that, isn't there), but when it comes right down to it, WHAT it looks like, be it male or female genitalia doesn't have as much to do with the overall pleasure of it as if the owner of said genitalia knows what they are doing. ;)

Now this thread has ventured back into a topic addressed on another one: Keigel Exercises. Tone those muscles to avoid the sloppy style!

Warning Graphic: Not for Immature Audiences.






Many of you ladies have had your salad tossed!

Wait wait wait, I hear gasping and see heads shaking in denial, be patient and I will explain.

LEts take a minute and look at the anatomy of the nether regions of a woman.

ITs a lot like the two holes you put your fingers into when carrying a 6 pack of cans. . . next time you have a 6-pack get the feel for it.

With about the same distance in between the proverbial feel-good hole and the taboo hole.

That is why some guys will look at a hot petitie body and say: "I could hold her like a six-pack!"

Now being a virgin and all, I have no personal knowledge but I do listen and ask questions.

Ok the guy is taking his time and being very careful: He is licking the inner thighs, a little above, around the taint (nice word rubbersoul) getting her into it before he starts on more sensitive areas like the lips . . . and he takes his time there before starts in that most sensitive of places because he knows it can be too senstive before the woman is completely aroused.

And that starts the problem as the woman is approaching orgasm she starts moving more and more and he is just trying to stay in the right place . . . and then . . .

(dramatic pause)

She slips over the brink into that special moment! And lets face it, she goes a little beserk. Hips thrusting body spasming back arching loud cries, the whole 9 yards.

Now his thoughts are reduced to simple survival.

He knows for the next couple minutes of her orgasm he will be deprived of air because she has him trapped.

He knows he has to keep his toungue extended or she might kill him out of rage.

He also has to manintain consciousness while not only deprived of air, but being pummeled in the face by her pubic region the way a boxer works a speedbag.

And then it happens.

He is fixed in place, toungue extended, and near death from hypoxia.

She is moveing her hips up and down . . . and the distance betwen the good hole and the bad hole is like the top of a 6-pack . . .

Its inevitable . . .a slip, toungue touches hole, hell nose probably touches hole and voila!

Your salad has been tossed!

You ladies need to get over your denial and face facts :D.

Now this doesn't happen to guys because our anatomy is different.

Sorry for rambling a bit but I was writing from work.

http://www.plaudersmilies.de/uhoh3.gif
http://www.plaudersmilies.de/faga1.gif
http://www.plaudersmilies.de/pfohnmacht.gif

No, no James. Girls do not have taints! Although, I do definitely understand your point... that boys might meander toward that area, sometimes unintentionally.

See my brief explanation, which was posted on page two of this thread, below:

True, but that patch of flesh right below the beginning of the "jade gate" is still considered an erogenous zone on a lady ;).

Next time you are in some hot and heavy foreplay . . be conscious of the feeling :D .

Just for your info...

You are booked on the following:

Delta Airlines Flight 83 Departing Louisville, Wednesday, October 9, 2002, 10:10AM, Non-Stop service to San Antonio, Arriving 12:05PM.

I'll be the one at the gate holding the bar of soap. ;)

:D

Okay, lifesaver, say- Scrub-a-dub-dub! If you rub right a genie might pop out........
lol!!!
I have officially realized I am sexually frustrated!

i'm ttoo drunk

So that's what you looked like when he hitted it? :D

Listen, I'm sorry about the kind of guys you've come across who are about as slick as sandpaper.

1. The guys that dribble don't get it enough. Do it several times a day to him and after a while the dribble is gone. Also ask him to address a thank you note to me as well as a large check.

2. I'm not sure what smelt is. But it can't compare to the taste of blue cheese and sardines mixed oh so well together. Perhaps you should have the guy take a shower first?

3. Haha, the cologne thing is seriously high school. Next time have him spray it on a pulse point behind the knee-cap.

4. I am not using lube to make the taste go away. This isn't a salad bar where I just grab condiments and croutons and hope it tastes just like chicken.

-Rudey
--And KappaKittyKat, I don't get slapped. I will make the girl feel like I'm different from every other guy out there...that she's the only girl that exists...and for that I expect and demand that my coffee mug doesn't get a dose of half and half.

*scrubing my soul right next to lifesaver*

(turns to lifesaver)

"how YOU doin?"

*continues scrubbing*

I am at work! I shouldn't be reading this!

QTE

LMAO no this is my reaction to James' words. The last one is me passed out DEAD from all that he said.

Yo' bad for getting down with chicks who's junk is stank and brackish.

Yeah Rudey! I hope you know thats not normal:eek: