"You'll end up where you were meant to"... - Page 5

ZetaLuvBunny · #1 01-29-2002, 10:07 PM

Bravo! Encore!

justamom · #2 01-31-2002, 07:06 AM

ErikaXO, I have to say you have been sharing some wonderful opinions. I really enjoy reading your posts on the different aspects of Greek issues.

shadokat · #3 01-31-2002, 10:10 AM

Erika--

Your post was great, with the exception of one thing I'd like to comment on. Do you honestly believe that recruitment is a microcosm of society? I mean, yes, there are similarities, but if life was like an SEC recruitment, I'd have shot myself by now

Recruitment is helpful in that you learn skills on how to deal with people you don't know and how to get to know folks, but it hardly compares with the real world.

Guess I just have a different perception.

Heather

LeslieAGD · #4 01-31-2002, 10:18 AM

In a perfect Greek world where there were no elite sororities and rush infractions/dirty rushing didn't happen, we wouldn't need so many recruitment rules and "no contact" policies. As I have mentioned before (see my Rho Chi Point of View thread), my campus has 8 national sororities and 3 that are considered "the big three" during recruitment. When I was a Rho Chi, my partner and I made it very clear on the second day that in order to find the sorority that best fits you, you must be willing to see past the "happy recruitment facade" and judge these chapters fairly. Out of my entire group, 15 girls stuck with recruitment and only was was dropped the day of preference. I am proud to say that these 14 girls are doing great and as far as I know, they are all very committed to their organizations and none of them has dropped. My point is that I don't think it's unfair to say that most girls will end up where they are meant to be if they actually give each house a fair shot before and after they get a bid. Now, remember that I am speaking from a mid-size Michigan school, not a large southern school where the massive amount of PNMs can cause complications.

ErikaXO · #5 01-31-2002, 10:41 PM

Heather, I agree that SEC rush is especially tough....but I believe rush is a lot like real life. Think about it...you are going for a job. You are up against countless other faces, some more qualified, some less. It will all come down to who the interviewer clicks best with. May not be the most educated or even most qualified. Same thing with the whole dating scene. Does a guy really pick you (initially) on your entire spectrum of inner qualities? No.....there is something, usually physical, that draws him to you over the numerous others he could go for. I guess the greater meaning of what I intended is to say that life is not fair. Ever. And the way rush is conducted is a pretty good example of that. But I respectfully acknowledge your opinion and if I had gone to an SEC school I might see it differently.

amycat412 · #6 01-31-2002, 11:36 PM

Erika-- GREAT MINDS think alike! See my post in the Dartmouth thread, I said practically the same thing!

amycat412 · #7 02-01-2002, 01:53 AM

My big sis' best friend (and my best friend's big sis) Susie was a double Chi O legacy, both her mom and grandma were not only XOs, but XOs from our chapter. Both were past Presidents of the chapter.

Susie grew up with Chi O this and Chi O that and spending weekends around the house helping her dad and brothers paint, etc.

She wanted to make her own choices, and she cut XO at first opportunity, thinking that was what she had to do to make her own choice, not have it made for her by the weight of her family's legacy on our campus.

Well, as it turned out Susie pref'd two houses and got cross cut.

XO snap bid her and she went on to be President of our chapter as well.

I am not a fan of the whole "you'll end up where you were meant to" thing at all-- too many people can drop thru the cracks or have an off week and rush badly and have it devastate them. The smallest thing can throw off someone's rush.

But like h2oot said, the system, in spite of its flaws, works and the majority of PNMs get placed. You may not get your first choice--but in those early stages, I do believe you could be happy in a number of different chapters, not just one or two, its once we've been in our chapters for awhile that we find they've become a home and we couldn't imagine ourselves anywhere else.

But again, that's not to say the system is perfect or works for everyone. That is obvious. But i think it works more often than it doesn't.

shadokat · #8 02-01-2002, 05:32 PM

I guess our recruitment is just different from what you all experienced. With 10 sororities and 150 girls going through recruitment, nobody slips through the cracks or gets lost. On our campus 100 girls signed up for recruitment. First round was on the 30th. Only 64 of the 100 came. So, now you have 10 sororities vying for only 64 women. If you're lucky, you'll get 80-85% return rate to second round, and hopefully do as well for prefs. But trust me...the bigger sororities don't cut anyone because they know that the more women that want them, the less chance they have of missing quota. It is sad the number of women who go through recruitment making it all the way to prefs and never even getting a second thought for a bid. I remember one year, we had 85 girls go through recruitment and one of the sororities had 80 of those women come back for prefs. There is NO WAY that should happen.

So as for you all who go to big schools and have all that hub bub that goes with recruitment, congrats, and enjoy it. You could be fighting for 6 women.

LeslieAGD · #9 02-02-2002, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by shadokat
I remember one year, we had 85 girls go through recruitment and one of the sororities had 80 of those women come back for prefs. There is NO WAY that should happen.

Whoa! We have a policy where you can only invite a certain percent back to each round so that those kinds of situations don't happen!

PiPhiERDoc · #10 02-02-2002, 09:09 PM

You're absolutely right about that -- it should NEVER be that "strong" house ends up with that many girls on preference. The way it works with our Panhell (and I think this is, or should, be pretty standard) is that your invite number is based on the precentage of rushees who have returned for the last three years. I.E. if quota is 20, and you have had an 80% return rate for the past 3 years, you would get to invite back 44 (so hopefully you will have 2 parties of 20 rushees each).
This is such a difficult issue, and I really see it playing out on our small campus. When you only have 5 houses, it is pretty easy for rushees to figure out who the "top"houses are. We have lost 1 chapter in the last five years, and another is really struggling...but of course if that one goes, then someone else has to be on the bottom, and I feel like our greek system is slowly being chipped away. While we have been lucky to be one of the strong houses on campus, as I look at this now from the prospective of an advisor, it makes me really sad to see that this happen because one house's struggle (or loosing a chapter) makes us ALL weaker. To be the last house standing is NOT the goal. And I also get a chance to work with the other advisors and know that every house on our campus has something to offer. However, I also know that this is easy to say when I was lucky enough to pledge the house of my dreams...it would have been hard to join a chapter that you weren't sure was going to be around in a year or two. Ugh! No good solutions.

roxydiva · #11 06-12-2002, 11:03 PM

ill bite, and add my two cents!

as some of you might know, i rushed at IU this past...fall/winter. whatever. i dropped out after the first round, disappointed in the houses that had asked me back. then i participated in COB, and was only asked by one of the houses that i didnt return to during formal rush. now i went to this house, and while they were nice, i knew it wasnt for me. now many people on here understood my point of view, others were disappointed i did not keep going during formal. now the opportunity is somewhat arisen that i am one of the girls that is helping attempt to bring tri sigma back to IU. i couldnt be happier (though if it doesnt work out...i might be just a TAD upset!) and i realize that this was meant to be for me. i knew when i dropped out of COB that it wasnt the end of my greek opportunity.

now im sure there are plenty of circumstances where people dont not end up in the houses they were "meant to be in" or what not, but i think for the most part, it all works out the way its supposed to, and it all happens for a reason. hope you all enjoyed my story!

roxydiva

StarGirl02 · #12 06-13-2002, 12:17 AM

My first rush was something I wish I could forget. I was having a great time, till our 4th round picks came along. Getting a call from my PX just minutes before meeting up with my rush group and saying "you didn't get any bids back," upset me, and I was in tears. What made it even worse was the fact that every other rushee in my rush group got a bid on Bid Day. Like any other person, I was upset, and I started to think if this was something i really wanted. And another thing that really hurt was when a PX told some other girls and I something to the point of, if you make it to the 3rd round, you'll get a bid. When COB events started coming up, I figured, what would it hurt to go? Still, nothing happened.

Then came informal rush. By this time, I knew this was something I wanted. And I guess in a way, I was kind of lucky, b/c I knew which sororities I wanted to visit. But again, nothing came of it. Talk about being slapped across the face twice.

Luckily, everything worked out in the end, and now I'm with a great group of girls, who I love dearly.

Glitter650 · #13 06-13-2002, 01:53 AM

Although my school's rush isn't competetive AT ALL (we only have 3 NPC sorors) and half of the people on our campus don't care if we exist or not and most people outside the greek system don't even know the reps of any group...I have to say I'm one of those girls who ended up where I belong.... and it was quite a road for me to get there... I know in a larger system that is very hard for EVERYONE to say... however I think if a lot of people that think they "belonged" in "top tier" sororities really thought about why they wanted to belong it may be for the wrong reasons. I believe what truly makes a woman "fit" in a sorority is personality... not their stats on a piece of paper. I mean of course what they've done before rush and their GPA can say something about a PNM, but I'm just trying to say that just because someone is beautiful, has a 4.0, discovered the cure for aids when she was 12, figured out a way to end world hunger, and cleans up the highway in her spare time doesn't mean she should assume she belongs in a "top tier" sorority.
That point aside, and getting back to the point it seems to me(PURELY MY OPINION) some of these "top tier sec sororities" are picking girls for the wrongs reasons... and that seems to be more the problem than us here at GC telling us they will end up where they belong...

FuzzieAlum · #14 06-13-2002, 01:21 PM

I think that every top tier sorority eventually rolls down and someone else bubbles up to the top. The chapter that was #1 when I rushed is now definitely #3 in terms of recruitment, and the group that was #1 when I graduated seems to have been replaced by yet another chapter.

I think a chapter really becomes "top tier" through the luck (?) of getting a few strong, go-getting members who really influence the organization and draw new girls in. But in the process of getting the most popular, beautiful, smart girls, it's inevitable that some people will think they are snobs, and the next round of go-getters go somewhere else, bringing their house up to the top.

At least, that's my theory.

nycgirl · #15 06-14-2002, 09:03 PM

It is so interesting to hear that girls visit colleges and sororities before they attend. It is also wierd to imagine going to a college where you know a lot of people from high school. what happens to girls from out of state who rush. I am especially interested in this because my younger sister considering applying to some big southern schools. being from ny she doesn't know many people in sororities except me and my friends, and definetely would not know anyone at a southern school (in fact i don't think she knows anyone living south of jersey. would this put her at a huge disadvantage for rush? what are some things that might help her?