[jtrain12]

Alright so I am a sophmore transfer to a large (30,000) state school. I have always been sort of indifferent towards the greek system. My dad was greek, and he still maintains contact with his brothers and he is still involved in his local chapter, although he has said that the greek system has "its positives and negatives." I never got involved in the greek system at my old school, becasue first semester I wanted to get used to the new school, and 2nd semester, I was 99% sure I was not going to be back the next year.
Since my new school has a housing problem, I am not living in a dorm, but off campus, so it is somewhat difficult to meet people. So I decided that trying to join a fraternity would be a good way to meet people, among other things. I went to the greek fair at my school, and took a couple of flies and gave my numbers to some of the fraternities that I found interesting.
The next day was when all the fraternities had their open houses. I had five houses in mind that I wanted to visit. The first one that I visited just happened to be the one closest to where I am living. I spent alot of time there talking to the brothers and getting to know them and what the fraternity was all about, and I felt really good about that fraternity. I learned that they required at least 12 credits in order to pledge, which gave me an advantage over the freshmen. Upon leaving, they invited me to a party they were throwing that night, and to tailgate with them at the footballgame the next day. After that, I visited the other houses that I was interested in. One of them didn't seem very interested in talking with the rushees, while the others didn't feel like as good as a fit as the first one. That night, I went to the party of my first choice frat, had a good time, and felt even better about it.
At the football game the next day, I got to meet even more brothers (there are 70 in all), and talked with both the president and the rush chair, which I felt like I created a good rapport with them. After spending more time getting to personally know more of the brothers, we went to the football game, had a good time, and then went to a party they were throwing that night. It was much of the same, talking with the brothers I had already met, and getting to know the other ones.
The following night was another party. It was much of the same thing, however, when I was talking to one brother about the whole rush process and about bids and that sort of thing, he said to me, "you seem like a good guy, so you should have no problem getting a bid." After that, I felt very good about the frat, I felt like a fit in and got along with the brothers, and as if it was only a matter of time until I got a bid. This was only furthered the next day when one of the other brothers whom had befriended me early on invited me to lunch with himself and another brother. He then invitied me to lunch at the house the next day. However, I wasnt able to make it as I had a meeting which ran longer then I thought, which I told him about and appologized for.
Later that day there was a scheduled rush event which was billiards and wings at this pool hall which was about a 20 minute drive from campus. Two brothers drove me, one of which was the one who had befriended me. The rush event went pretty well, more socalizing with the brothers and meeting new ones. However, after about two hours there, the brother who had driven me told me that we were leaving, along with another rush who didn't really seem to be talking with anyone. This was my first sign of worry. If they wanted me to join, then why would they be asking me to leave?
My worries continued until the next day, when I ran into two of the brothers at seperate times, one of which was the fraternity president. They both invitied me to a party that they were having. My worries went away, as I felt if the fraternity president is inviting me to a party, then I must be in good shape. However, when I was at the party, I noticed that some of the brothers who I had grown clsoe with didn't talk to me as much as that weekend. They wereent being mean, but I guess it was more of the cold shoulder thing. A couple of the other brothers talked to me, and asked me various questions, like "why do I want to join this frat?", which I felt I answered well. Regardless, I left that party very concerned about my bid chances, much more so then the night before.
The next night was another official rush event. They would be watching the NFL season opener at the frat house. Although this was an official rush event, no one called me about it, which concerend me. Regardless, I went, and it was the same sort of thing as the night before, and the brother who had befriended me seemed to not be talking to me with. I played it off by thinking that they just wanted to get to know the other potential rushees, but by that time i was very very worried.
The next day was Friday. I knew that they would be throwing a party, but they did not tell me the address the night before. No problem, I thought, they will call me. However, it got later and later, and no call. I debated about wether to call someone and ask about it, but I knew that I couldnt make a good impression if I wasnt there. Finally, I bit the bullet and called the brother who had befriended me. He told me the place and time. I went there, and although it was not as good as the previous weekend, it went better then the previous three nights. During that night, I talked to someone who had already gotten a bid, and he told me that I should talk to the rush chairman and president and tell them that I really wanted a bid, and that it was very important to me. Well, I didn't get a chance to talk to either of them that night, so I told the brother that had befriended me that I really wanted to be in the frat, and that it was very important to me. He kind of gave me this sad look, and said, yea, I know man, which didnt exactly make me feel good about my odds.
The next night was the same thing. No one called me, so I ended up calling a brother (different one). At first he told me they werent having that night, but then he gave me the place and time. I figured that this was my last chance to do something, so I made a point to talk to the rush chairman and the president at the advice that I had been given the night before. By this point, I was feeling really bleak about my odds to get a bid, but I figured that if I didn't do something about it, then i would regret it. I talked to the rush chairman, who gave me a "cool man, we'll talk later!" which accomplished nothing. The fraternity president, though, I was actually able to have a real conversation. He told me that he wasnt sure if they had made a final decision on the bids, because he didn't really talk about it with the rush chairman. I knew that the invite dinner was on Monday, so I asked him if somebody would tell me if I would be invited either way, which he said they would.
Well, you can guess what happened. I wasn't invited, and I was not called either. It didn't really suprise me, because of they way things had unfolded. but I kept wondering what it was that occured. Only a couple of days before, it seemed imminenet that I would get a bid, and now, nothing. It dissapointed me because I felt like I was a really good fit in that fraternity. I still may re rush in the spring, but right now, I am just not sure, as I am too down about this. If anyone who knows a little more about this could give me some insight, it would be really helpful for me!